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Ruth Cardenas May 25
I'm afraid, you're stranded out at sea
With the coldest parts you only seemed to know
A feeling that came following my name
With the darkest parts I only ever showed

I'm afraid you're asking for goodbye
I don't blame you, no one really likes the cold
But I admit it, you were something of a warmth to me
Safe at midnight when the thoughts tore at my soul

I'm afraid because I see it in your eyes
They don't shine for me the way they did before
A sunken sadness but who else is there to blame
I decimated all the love placed in my corner

I'm afraid because I sense it's not the same
I'm afraid because I feel it quietly
I'm afraid because you've finally drawn the line
I'm afraid the day has come where you've left me
Ruth Cardenas May 25
Broken hearts are falling like the rain
Molded smiles but inside they feel the ache
Follow paths and on those roads they reminisce
Because they thought eventually they wouldn't feel it

Clouded light and darkened words are the defense
For that constant ache they prayed would someday end
And fed ideas that they weren't crushed by this
A sense of freedom but somehow still run from it
Ruth Cardenas May 12
How I wished to end a sadness
One as dark as it is deep
I longed-for that goodbye
But the evil follows me

I craved for my tranquility
A broken sequence in my peace
Hindered me from happiness
It dismantled parts of me

I yearned for a forever
In the moments that the rain
Poured along the concrete floor
And collided with my pain

How I prayed for just one moment
Where the sadness left my eyes
Just one second of serenity
I'd stop hoping for goodbye
Ruth Cardenas May 10
I've watched you study Diamond lights
And of their beauty, you'd tell me
Wrapped entirely in your awe
Thankful you'd witnessed such beauty

They sung a song with melodies
Like oceans' current passing by
And not one moment you'd forget
Those wonders witnessed by your eyes

I've kept a hidden melody
The one I sing from time to time
To your ears, maybe a whisper
But a symphony, in mine

I've heard you speak of melodies
I've watched you study Diamond lights
I've wished that you might see me too
But I could never climb that high
Ruth Cardenas Apr 10
The word friend is a trail headed nowhere.

Full of promises and false illusions.

Misused and taken advantage of.

I am deaf to the word.
To the origin.
I am deaf to the one who speaks it.

Don't call me a friend.

Because I see the way it is thrown around, by you.

Like trash.

Like pieces of a broken trust.

Like fragments of a bond that took seconds to break.

Like time wasted.

Don't call me a friend.

You don't know the first thing of the word.
Ruth Cardenas Feb 26
You said you would handle it
If the day ever came
You wouldn't be pulled back in
If he came back today

You said you were over it
your heart is anew
And you’d never wander back
You promised that, too

All those free tears he gave you
When he left you, that day
Don’t you remember
How he left you afraid

And it took you forever
Just to think of his name
Without falling over
Without drowning in pain

You thought you were stronger
I did too; Its okay
I hope you can make it
Reliving that pain
Ruth Cardenas Feb 24
Ill admit it, you surprised me
But it wasn't worth the wait
Or the tears; or the sadness
Just not worth it, Im afraid

I had words I left unsaid
I had a million things to say
But I was bleeding out my pride
I was bleeding out my pain

Months of sleeping with the lights on
Every second, tossed in bed
It was a private, mental torture
I suffocated, in my head

So forgive me, when you ask
When at you, I shake my head
Forgive me when I choose my peace
Over letting you in, again
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