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Jul 2021 · 35
stay high
thorn Jul 2021
**** around and never come down
Jul 2021 · 164
kys or get over it
thorn Jul 2021
it doesn’t matter who buried the knife first
we both had a blade hidden the entire time
Jul 2021 · 28
Mars, Revised.
thorn Jul 2021
I really hope this kills me
Existence is a night sky
And Freedom is a shooting star
But I’ll shoot for the moon
And meet you at Mars
Jun 2021 · 354
cardiac
thorn Jun 2021
I love feeling my heart get weaker
I mean hey
I asked it to stop pumping a long time ago
Jun 2021 · 625
itty
thorn Jun 2021
vulnerability
i should've been able to indulge in it
Jun 2021 · 203
heat waves
thorn Jun 2021
Summer this year doesn’t feel like all the others
I can’t help but see the calories on a can of Arizona tea
Abanonded on a park bench
When did that become all I could see?
May 2021 · 60
she's still sleeping
thorn May 2021
you can't make dying a competition
when the winner is the loser
and the loser is the winner
don't find peace
"she's still sleeping"
"it's not like her to sleep in this long, i'm gonna go check on her"
May 2021 · 82
now then and forever
thorn May 2021
i don't care when you won't love me
it's just cool that your here now
May 2021 · 69
07302002
thorn May 2021
2001
halloween
a broken girl
a broken boy
***** a missed dose of birth control and a broken ******
"callee"
a guardian angel sacrfice
May 2021 · 1.0k
iris
thorn May 2021
wake up
you wouldn't wanna miss your autopsy
May 2021 · 296
mors voluntaria
thorn May 2021
you're the closest to heaven
that i'll ever be
May 2021 · 51
growing pains
thorn May 2021
menthol cigerettes
vomiting
starvation
depression
suicidal idealization
heartbreak
it’s all growing pains, baby
May 2021 · 96
prom queen
thorn May 2021
it'll never be enough
because if it was i would be suffering
m̶o̶r̶e̶
May 2021 · 181
ribs
thorn May 2021
underneath my skin
favorite sin
:)
May 2021 · 93
it doesn't matter anymore
thorn May 2021
over the moon
observing active decay
day by day
May 2021 · 61
asbestos
thorn May 2021
you were home
you made me really sick
thorn May 2021
he once wrote on my bulletin board in animal crossing
"you're precious"
my baby
my baby
you're my baby
say it to me
May 2021 · 89
i'm lying
thorn May 2021
it won't matter that i wasn't enough
if we all one day will experience the same thing
we're all as worthy as one another
and that's enough validation for me
May 2021 · 122
ephiphany
thorn May 2021
why are there already nats around me?
i'm not dead yet you freaks
May 2021 · 101
anyway here's wonderwall
thorn May 2021
the original me bled out on her mothers ***** bathroom floor
the filth and abuse because too much for her
everything since that day
hasn't
felt
real
shady what the ******* saying!?
"I don't know help me!"
thorn May 2021
i know you say mean things when i cancel plans
but i don't care
too being decomposing where i lay
can't save me man
save yourself
May 2021 · 60
selfish
thorn May 2021
how i know i feel this for me
is i don't fantasize about all the tears
the screaming
the regrets
the denial
the begging
the anger
the depression
the hopelessness
the acceptance
the forgetting
my soul feels amazing at the thought of just nothing
May 2021 · 53
sober ego death
thorn May 2021
and i cried at the curb
when you first said "Oel ngati kameie"
May 2021 · 33
euphoria
thorn May 2021
acceptance
this is where i came from
this IS familiar
it'll be ok
it'll be absolute euphoria
thorn May 2021
when my day comes
i know what i'll feel
i'll feel the fear
the realization
the regret
the awareness
the acceptance
it'll be the most terrifying and peaceful moment
the moment i was born to feel
the feeling i was destined to experience
starting as a twinkle in my fathers eye
the first atom in the giant explosion of stars and galaxies
that nonexistence gave birth to from the canal of endless black abyss
thorn May 2021
if i hide long enough
if no one sees me
do i exist
May 2021 · 29
spit on my grave
thorn May 2021
how could you look at someone
and tell them
"how is anyone suppose to love you when you're sick?"
with fancy words
while they lie on their deathbed?
May 2021 · 38
existential
thorn May 2021
you are all the things that are wrong with you
May 2021 · 35
keep those eyes open
thorn May 2021
i can't indulge in my favorite escape
it'll make me fat
May 2021 · 41
no
thorn May 2021
no
one day
you'll be on recieved forever
May 2021 · 62
sarah lynn?
thorn May 2021
ive been a walking corpse for months
but the audience wants encore
do they know i'm dying?
sarah lynn?
May 2021 · 87
am i tired
thorn May 2021
i know this will **** me
i don't seem to care
i wanna be laid to rest in all the happy memories i have always been swadeled in
it seems as though that blanket only drew to my ankles
i have cold feet about the rest of my life
May 2021 · 47
ode to natawsha
thorn May 2021
chasing a size zero
don't eat enough for one
when you look at yourself it's doubled in two
and  at times you think it might be three
but in reality those numbers are far, even farther from four
ignore it, until sombody tells you you've gone down by five
it hurts, it hurts, eat like six
because you starved for seven
chase it down with a diet coke, what's next you'll feel in about eight
because down the hatch goes laxatives, count them out nine
your visions covered in tracers and you think you're at ten
even though everyone else can read "zero"
happy mothers day
May 2021 · 50
this is a testament
thorn May 2021
like smoking a stoagie
noise traveling through my head like smoke in the air
straight up potent
kinda feeling i'd love to share
nasuea out in the open
and a head high that can't compare
i love sunset drives
thorn May 2021
21
beat up old truck
long hair
****** hair
rugged skin
every bit of muscle finished growing and boney hands
sixty dollar phone
dead-end job
**** and acid
17
skinny legs and dusty knees
FRIENDS hoodie from TJ Maxx
cheap shoes
little sixty dollar phone
working part time
you ruined me
May 2021 · 123
i sat in my car screaming
thorn May 2021
please don't leave me
please
please
please
pleaaase don't leave me
i love you so much
please don't leave
i'll be anything you want me to be
i'll lose weight i'll let you cheat on me just please don't leave
please don't leave me
i'm sorry i got angry when you ****** another girl just please stay baby i'll do anything for you please
May 2021 · 71
splitting
thorn May 2021
*******
baby
i hate you so much
please don't leave me
get the **** away from me you disgusting *****
i'll change i promise
this is why nobody likes you
it wasn't you, it was me
why the **** are you like this you knew this would upset me
i'll be anything you want me to be sweetheart don't leave me please
i'm in the process of trying to get tested for BPD/ treated for whatever I have
i can just remember everything i sabotaged because i crave instability
May 2021 · 218
don't wake
thorn May 2021
i'll shove every word into my skull
until the tears stop falling
and i forget your face
thegirlyoufuckedwhileiworkedanextrashiftsoicouldgetyouanicechristmaspresentlistenedtoolivertreeandhonestlyfuckyoubothwhydidyoucheatonmemaybeihurtyousometimesbutfuckyouusetocallmearetardandabitch
Apr 2021 · 54
we're just good friends
thorn Apr 2021
i ain't mrs.right
but i'll ******* til she gets here
Apr 2021 · 87
high school sweethearts
thorn Apr 2021
i never understood how you can love someone
and not be ready for them
because if it was true love you'd take them
anytime
anyday
anywhere
any life
but that's just not the case
when i look at you i see somebody whose loved me for a long time
and i've taken it for granted because on some level it's not what i want
truly
if i ever had your heart
i'd take it for granted
but it's ok babe
just hold my hand
and we'll go get cotton candy together.
we never dated but we've been connected a long time
i chose someone else over you and looked what happened
i think on some level i deserved it
for what i did to you
but hey,
holding grudges over love is ancient artifacts
Apr 2021 · 89
the boy who cried wolf
thorn Apr 2021
i'd be lying if i said i didn't miss the way your arms shield me from the cold
i'd be lying if i said i didn't miss how you wrapped yourself around me like i was your everything
i'd be lying if i said i don't wanna feel how i did whenever you'd pull me closer in your sleep
but
i wouldn't exactly be telling the truth if i said i miss the way you never listened
i wouldn't exactly be telling the truth if i told you i loved the names you called me whenever i would be having a freakout
i wouldn't exactly be telling the truth if i implied that i enjoyed the way cheated on me
but then again
i love the way you lie
Apr 2021 · 37
cold turkey
thorn Apr 2021
i didn't ween myself off of you
even though you were the most addicting drug i've ever touched
one day i decided i couldn't take the comedowns anymore
no matter how high i got off you
i'd like to tell my family i've kicked you
my skins glowing and my smile no longer seldom
yet sometimes the idea of you sets my soul ablaze
and i get the urge
to pick through all my files
emails
messages
memories
carpet picking for shards of you
even the worst of you
i've quit you cold turkey
but it's a fun idea, isn't it?
Apr 2021 · 62
050585
thorn Apr 2021
abyss
void of sound
eyes tightly clenched shut
digits connected to tense palms over little ears
nothing can hurt me here
or so i thought
all the times she screamed at me
i should've just covered my ears
but now it's too late
Apr 2021 · 269
healer
thorn Apr 2021
don't worry about me
i'll worry about you
it's my job
relax son,
i'm your guardian angel
if your soul is cracking at the seams
you can have some of mine
and when i'm gone
you can return it with your tears
and replace it with my peace
777
Apr 2021 · 51
i'll be god
thorn Apr 2021
Material divided
The odds aren't great
But the longer I stare into your picture
I know what sacrifices I'm willing to make
My fingers play with the silk slipping back and forth
Now there is a ribbon around my torso
Plastic china shrank to distort
Ever so slowly
Painfully
Carving skin
Against an indifferent ribbon
Apr 2021 · 205
i don't know what i miss
thorn Apr 2021
orange and red streaks reflected on garden eyes
smoke in my lungs
and a tiny bit of cancer between two delicate fingers
as you grow, everything changes
for better or for worse
life is short baby girl
light a cig
Apr 2021 · 114
you
thorn Apr 2021
you
hi there
strawberry locks
porceline skin
seashell pink lips
hiding teeth so fair
someone who has me lost
despair becoming thin
let me brush your hair with my finger tips
i knew from the moment i met you
we were gonna change each others life
i chased after being happy when you were around
and walked when you could no longer run
maybe the universe isn't so cruel
loving someone, not by the edge of a knife
of you, i surround myself with an excessive amount
because loving you is fun
Apr 2021 · 165
pumpkin head
thorn Apr 2021
some things bring me joy
like the drip of a faucet
coming to an end
knowing there will be a day
where there will be one less boy
and between life and death you shall cross it
lay in your eternal bed
what i love most about you
is that one day you'll be dead
call me crazy
but i hate your ******* guts
you'll never see me again
but just know
i revel in how much i can depise you
Apr 2021 · 546
there is no other side
thorn Apr 2021
waking up in the middle of the night
struggling to breathe
searching for anything my eyes can find
noticing all the little statics of reality
this is a losing fight
and no one can save me
here, there is no individuality
sleeping is micro dosing death
and when i realized that
eternal slumber didn't worry me as much
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