He says, "I'm not asking for much"
She gives him butterflies with every touch
He notes her on the way her eyes glow
She says "There's things you don't know"
He doesn't force her to explain
She enjoys this through her pain

He tells his friends about this girl,
"She's the most beautiful in this world"
He ignores their laughs and remarks,
"At least I think with my heart"
His friends laugh again and say this,
"Yo man lemme know after you hit"

She cries at night because she truly cares
Her sister shows concern so she shares
"There's a guy and I'm actually interested"
(She's never had relationships with time invested)
Her sister hugs her and they both cry
She stays up all night as hours go by

He continues to pursue his infatuation
She accepts forcing a sad situation
He takes his time to spite his friends
She knew exactly when it would end
The night came when he used the word "love"
She prayed that night to the Lord above...

"Dear Father,
Why did I ever experience this pain
When I didn't even know his name
I still can remember my mouth taped
The night in the alley when I was *****
My faith and hope are only beginning to fade
He won't love me when he finds out I have AIDS"           

The next day he and she decide to meet
On a particular and familiar street
She tells him everything and he looks surprised
Smiling he says, "Remember, when I said I loved your eyes"
She cries because this wasn't what was planned
He gives her something little by holding her hand.

Stop showing
You love me
A little at a time.

Stop saying
You care
Bit by bit.

Stop keeping
Me here
For tiny pieces of time.

Because I need
All of you
Not piece by piece.

I love
All of you
Not just some parts of you.

So love all of me
All the way
All the time.

Or let all of me go
All at once
For good.

"O, to be a whirling dervish,"
I think to myself
as I drunkenly stumble to the bedroom
and collapse, naked,
slurring bleary hate speech
to a god
I don't believe in.

She's in my presence,
she's in my brain,
she's what crowds my thoughts,
and drives me insane.
Sometimes i wish i held back,
for I've fallen in craze,
when she's gone my world's stallin',
when she's there I just gaze.

It cannot be healthy,
it's what I dismay,
it's the danger of loving,
when no heart is to gain.
for when I fall I fall hard,
but that's not absurd,
and when I do I stay long,
try to make her my bird.

Even when it's a dead end,
even if there's none,
even when my hope's down,
I stick around, which is dumb.
'bout me she's not thinking,
In her mind I'm not there,
I'm somewhere in her storage,
to be brought out as a spare.

Every nice guy recieves a duty,
for every girl he hangs around;
Every nice guy pursues the beauty,
who someone has already found.
It's really a sad matter;
It's not what is meant to be,
Seems like I'm stuck trying,
But one day I'll be free.

We spent so long in each others arm/
Wasted time, that really only did each other harm/
Whispered words and sweet nothings in each others ear/
Do you recall all those lies that you made me hear/
I tried so hard to stay in love with you/
After you, left me and, told me that we were through/
Tell me what did I ever do/
I felt so betrayed/

Woah/
It was you who broke me/
Beat me down for good/
But you did not destroy me/
Like you thought you would/

I'm fighting my way back to the top/
Climbing higher, then ever before/
I'm feeling like I'm never going to stop/
You won the battle, but I'll win the war/

How did he taste when you kissed his skin/
Was it smooth, was it love, inside you're every sin/
I waited patiently when he went in/
All alone, in my thoughts, wondering where you've been/
Shame on me for making you the one/
In my mind, I always knew that our time would come/
You never know I guess until you're done/
But your harm would never last/

Woah/
It was you who broke me/
Beat me down for good/
But you did not destroy me/
Like you thought you would/

I'm fighting my way back to the top/
Climbing higher, then ever before/
I'm feeling like I'm never going to stop/
You won the battle, but I'll win the war/

Can you tell me that you're better off/
Are you happy with where you stand/
Is he what you have been dreaming of/
Is he the better man/
Truth be told I'm not listening/
I'm finally feeling free/
Six years later i'm a brand new me/
And this is how i'm meant to be/
Woah/
It was you who broke me/
Beat me down for good/
But you did not destroy me/
Like you thought you would/

I'm fighting my way back to the top/
Climbing higher, then ever before/
I'm feeling like I'm never going to stop/
You won the battle, but I'll win the war/
Oh/
I've won this war/
I've won it/

I've driven past occasion on the date of
my realization;
A loners state of walk-in fast food joints
just to sit & eat alone

Unlucky aged elders
tell you what to do
& how to live
while their bank statements hold on
for dear life
like it's nothing to be concerned about
just as long as we follow
the
rules.

Helpless identifying self;
spreads worth like carbon
to an unviewing populace
of buttered up *****
selfish & corrupt

Helpless,
don't think you are.
You do something with your voice
& you let them know
just what
you mean when you say
anything at all.

……Now
With springing force
I was shot out into the future
And with needle to the suture
Sewed together what I could

Lo, the spring sprung back into
The autumn
Found my porthole at the bottom
Into all I understood

Yet,
An equal opposite reaction
Fueled combustibly by action
From believing things that I was told to read
Found
Me far beyond what I
had seen
Cross dystopian ravine
Though in spite of any betterment, still brought to you by greed

Now from safely at the station
In the cold and condensation
I can see with clearest vision
The successes of my mission
Here, within, the multitudinous expanse of tears and laughs
Will be difficult to honor with a proper epitaph