I wear long sleeves so that my scars
Don't make anyone uncomfortable
Because heaven forbid
Someone should know
I was ever less than happy.

- p. winter

My body filled with hate
All I know of is this eternal pain
All I feel is this cage
Shutting me in
And locking me down
I stay here
Not because I am a prisoner
But because this monster
That controls all my actions
Has completely convinced me
That this darkness
And all this pain
And these chains
These ******* chains
The ones I put on myself
These are what will keep me safe
They protect me from going to far
And from letting someone see who I really am
So as long as they never know
Whenever they abandon me
As they inevitably will
They don't really leave me
For they never knew what that was.

I sought the Lord
And found Him in the oddest place,
I found Him in my broken heart.

I can't take this pain
I can't live this way
Covered in all my shame
Everyone will go away

I don't want to live
I have no desire to keep going
I have nothing left to give
My scars are all showing

So please please just let me go
Don't make me be around you
Don't breathe out your lies
Don't make me believe you care
Let me go away
In the best way I know how
Don't look for me anymore
Because this leap is the last thing I have in store

Now don't cry for me
I know you don't really care
If you did then you would see
That I always wanted to share

All my pain with you
But I kept it inside
Because you don't care
And that's the truth

So please please just let me go
Don't make me be around you
Don't breathe out your lies
Don't make me believe you care
Let me go away
In the best way I know how
Don't look for me anymore
Because this leap is the last thing I have in store

Standing on this ledge
The depths below
I close my eyes and lean out
I take a deep breathe and scream out
Opening my eyes I see the world
In a whole new light
I see the sun as it goes down
And I realize I don't want to go with it
There is more life than this current pain and more to life than the storm and rain
So I breathe in deep and get off the ledge
I walk home and I hug the ones I love
And for the first time I realize
I am enough.  

So please please don't let me go
Don't let me be alone
Tell me these thoughts are lies
Show me that you really do care
Don't let me go away
Hold onto me
And don't let me leap
Stand by me when I'm about to plunge into the deep