ronnie Sep 7

She would tell me how she felt on certain days.
Some days she wouldn't, but I knew when I looked at the colour of her nail polish.
When her fingernails were yellow I knew she was doing okay.
She would tell me she felt warm instead of cold like on most days.
When her fingernails had clear sparkles on them, I knew she was
excited.
She told me she couldn't wait to finish her book.
I tried to understand her.
But this was the only way I could.
I saw her again but this time she didn't speak.
her fingers were in her jacket.
She looked straight ahead and never turned her head once to me.
We sat for hours until she got up, and took her hands out of her pockets.
She told me she wanted to die.


Her fingernails were blue.

ronnie Jun 23

we were running
we were running so fast until our knees became very weak
your hand was in mine
sweaty
we came to a stop
and looked at what was in front of us
what is it? I said
you kept staring and you said it's fresh air
but it was more than that
it was dreams
it was fear
it was life
we unlocked the cuffs around our wrists
and we kept staring

and i knew

it was freedom

ronnie May 1
?

how could you break me
but put me back together again
at the same time?

ronnie Apr 27

i was standing over hills
i was standing over mountains
i was so high that
nothing felt real anymore
i was finally free i thought
and then i looked beside me
and there you were
making me feel as small as possible
not letting me have-
please just give me


freedom

ronnie Mar 17

the pain starts to slowly settle in
i don't beg
i don't think
i don't forgive
but i feel
but i see


i ask

but what is


freedom


if you're not allowed to have it?

ronnie Feb 16

The Sun is pointed at my direction






But it never shines

ronnie Feb 8

i remember waking up very early in the morning
i turned around on the bed
i saw your face
surrounded with darkness with light
the darkness  from our room
and the light just peeking from the blinds
the light hitting your face
reminded me of sunsets rising turning into a brighter shade
of orange and pink
i looked down at your lips
reminding me of soft kisses
on my spine to make me forget
eyes closed
wondering what they were envisioning
wanting so bad for them to be open
just
so you could tell me


one more time


that you were tired

Still can't sleep.
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