a love that can never be replaced
style, elegance, grace, deceit and subtle element of hate
all traits you possess.

a love I have no desire of pursuing any longer
a love you permanently damaged, but only made me stronger
a love that doesn’t feel the same
a love you undermined
now it’s fair game.

i loved you
now my love is lost in a sea of deceit and your own superficiality
something you would have to confront
it was never going to be easy
i do hope it’s the most grueling, exhausting thing you’d ever have to go through

maybe you’d feel a pinch of how I felt being with you

but now you’ll understand how my love for you is now lost.

It's about 6 months later,
And your name continues to roll off my tongue
Like desperate droplets of water that,
Had by chance, gracefully made it's journey through the canopy of a forest.

It's about 6 months later,
And I continue to be tantalized,
As I reminisce about the moments of your very first touch.
The steady beating of your heart,
As my head lay stolid against your warm bust.

It's about 6 months later,
And your name still feels like home, yet so far away from home.
So close that I can touch it with my heart, but
So far that I can't even reach it with my arm.

It's been roughly 6 months later,
And I'm still not quite over you.
Your poetic stained lips drew me in like a bee to a flower;
******* up every single drop of nectar I could,
Concocting pure honey out of our love for each of us to devour.

It's about 6 months later,
And I am still entangled within your love.
Without the slightest intention of breaking free;
In hopes that I'll be somehow trapped for all of eternity, but,
Then again I have to think.
"Is this really the best thing for me?"
"Is the distance now between our hearts too far out of reach?"

Because it's been about 6 months now,
And it seems like you've moved on...
It's funny because I thought we would be together
Till Michael Jackson decided to sing another song,
Till Perry Christie gets re-elected, or,
Till Donald trump likes black folks at all.
All 3 things simply impossible,
As the thought of me and you not together.

But, it's been about 6 months now, and,
I'm beginning to feel a little bit under the weather.
"Together forever?", my friends would ask.
"Did you not hear me?" I would say
"Together forever, but for real this time...I'm sure of it...Trust me,
I know what I'm doing...I....love...him."

It's about 6 months later,
And I wonder every day if the thought of me ever crosses your mind.
If you think about us laying down watching the starry night sky while you're on your high,
If you happen to laugh from time to time about our silly inside jokes.
Remember baby, sigh...sigh...sigh...todo.

I sometimes ponder as to if it was real or was it just another story that began with "once upon a time",
But I always seem to find myself missing your poetically inclined, open mind, ******* you're fine,
Please take up all my time,
My heart begins to beat faster and faster.
****, I hope this story ends with "Happily Ever After".

It's about 6 months later,
And I pray that 6 months from now,
You will be able to look into my eyes and remember me
As the girl who has the audacity to be beautiful
Even on days when everything around her is ugly.
The girl who correlates your name with angels of a heavenly choir Singing at the beautiful exodus of her flight into the heavens.
The girl who was not afraid to get up in front of an audience
Of people she did not know,
Not only to prove to you that she was worth it,
But to pour out of her heart the startling truth...
That it's about 6 months later, and I am still solely in love with you.

bricks cemented together.
a wall.
surrounded by barbed gates and wire.
put up to turn away the most extreme weather.

weather?
love. feelings. you.

past relationships built this wall.
my heart is in a prison.
protected by the finest and most elite security.

i wanted you to break down my wall.
piece by piece.
so I can accept your love, flaws and all.
unfortunately my wall just became even more robust.

minor details.
the things you did, just gave me more reasons to keep my wall up.
the situation had me broken.
it had you broken too, that you couldn't be what I needed.

i'm sorry I placed you in a position where you had to play the role of a wrecking ball.
i watched you try to break down the wall.
bare hands.
clenched fists.
painful.

i watched you give up and cry.
your cry for help.
let me in please.

selfish.
that was selfish of me.
i should've known you wouldn't possess that kind of strength.

wildfire.

the more my love grew for you, the more you ran away from me.

protect yourself.
runaway and seek shelter.
pack your things, evacuate and move on.
how you suffered until you couldn't bare it anymore.
you left me alone to burn, consumed by my own flame.

i tried to understand, but I can't.
for you could not love me the way I loved you.
but my love was true, and for you.
you tried to put out my fire, now I realize you couldn't handle the everlasting flame of my love.

my love was the fire.
you were frightened by the thought of being swallowed by the heat of my flame.

i was only trying to love you.
you didn't want to get burned.
you couldn't embrace my feelings.
you ran.
you ran away from me.

i thought i was the light of your days.
but all i brought was darkness.
i thought i was giving you love.
but all I gave you was agony.
my flame gave off dark and hazy smoke, that blinded you.
my love was a wildfire.

Houston...
I try to mend things that are forever broken.
Let me drift away.
Don't help me.
I will find my way.

Houston we have a problem.
I believe it's time I relinquish my past, which you are apart of.
With you
My happiness
Under restriction.
Trying with you again is pointless.
I'm drowning in defeat and disappointment.

Houston you are my problem.
I can't hide from you anymore.
I must encounter the road of confrontation.
Tedious and weary, but staggering because it leads to your nature.