Remember those days
When you wanted me
Just as much
As I wanted you

We fight and fight
The love is still there
But the distance
Just cant be covered

We fell apart from each other
I drowned the love
With alcohol and drugs
And meaningless ***

While you continued
To hurt yourself
By breaking your heart
Over and over again

You know we were meant
To be together
But whats the point trying
That love is dead now

***** by our insanity
Murdered by our darkness
Lost in the distance
Forever we die alone

I broke your pathetic heart and watched it bleed....happily!

I hide my soul
I hide my thoughts
From a world
Too sane to comprehend
The darkness I hold
Within these walls

Caged and imprisoned
Feeding off the self-pity
Envy growing
As laughter comes in through the window
But still I'm alone
Hiding from the world

I love the silence
Hate thee loneliness
But even in the dark
Within these walls
We both are prisoners
To my subconscience

We watched in horror
As planes crashed
Into the World Trade Center
And eventually collapse

We watched with eyes dripping tears
As the TV screen
Flashes faces of innocent children
Gunned down at an Elementary school

What has this world come to be
Lives taken for no apparent reason
Lives taken of the most pure
And all we can do is grieve

We wage wars
We seek justice
But in the end we grieve
As we lose more lives either way

We watch from afar
As our troops
Come home on their shields
Drapped in our colors

Another day of grief
Another day of tears and mourns
Haven't enough lives been stripped?
Hasn't enough blood been shed?

The sound of my destruction
                                                Tick
                                                      Tick
                                                           Tick
I know it rest within me
I hear it day and night
Just ticking away
Like the hours on the clock
                                                Tick
                                                      Tick
                                                            Tick
It has became annoying
Never ending
I wonder when it will go off
So the pain will disappear
                                                Tick
                                                      Tick
                                                            Tick
I wish I had the button
To press it myself
But I noticed everytime I grow angery
Another minute falls off
                                                Tick
                                                      Tick
                                                            Tick
Such an aggravating sound indeed
But as I try to write
And hope the words I use
Capture a glimpse of what goes on in my mind
                                                Tick
                                                      Tick
                                                           BOOM!!!!!!!!!!!
The world goes white
Then red
As my blood and flesh
Paint every corner

No more pain
Just more bodies
The bodies of those who have always judged me
This is what you created

And with its detonation
Your death came to be
Ticking was my rage
Ticking was my tolerance
                                                 Tick
                                                       Tick
                                                             Ticking no more

Slithering shadow
Why after all these many years
Do you still walk beside me
Why oh why
Are you the only
Who cares to listen
Slithering shadow
Always there when I need a friend
No name for me to call you
Yet here you have a face
I do not look for a voice in reply
I look for an ear
Willing to sit with
Here the story to my troubled times
Slithering shadow
Are you real
Or just another hallucination

They say we are insane
Emotionally detached
Gay because we express ourselves
In words that can move mountains
We are strong
So what if we are always wrong
This is our ******* song
That we sing
As we pick ourselves up
Dust the days judgement off
Keep our chins high
And ask for another shot
So give us your best
My fellow poets
Walk through fire
Drown in the tears
Hide the fears
And say "We're not going anywhere"
Hahaha
We take your *******
Poets
Thats what we are
Young and old
Wise and reckless
Loved and hated
Yet here we are
HERE WE ARE!!!
Try to bring us all down together
Your funeral
We are strong
So what if we are always wrong
This is our ******* song
That we sing
All as one
The biggest band of misfits
The social and antisocial
The bruised and broken
My people
My congregation
Hahaha
My fellow poets
MY FELLOW POETS!!!
Wanna **** with us now
When you see the legions
Rising from the shadows
WE ARE ONE
WE ARE POETS
All we ever will be
We are strong
So what if we are always wrong
This is our ******* song
That we sing
Just to forget our judges

I'm Sorry

I heard all your screams
I listened to your stories
I rolled with the struggles
Yet here you are
Refusing to acknowledge my existence
Depressed as I am
And you make my loneliness
Even stronger every minute of the day
So here is a letter
To mark my suicide
That your selfish actions led to
I called several people
But it's late in the night
Phones are off
Sound asleep
As I race through thoughts
Through memories
Hoping one of them could save me
But I just lie here
Blade sharp
Bottle half empty
Nuse tied tight
Pistol loaded
All I'm waiting for is a reply
A letter back
That someone will listen
But that could be ages from now
Time I don't have
Dreams I will never achieve
So I bid you farewell
As I try and end this hell
To live in a world where
I truly am loved and never ignored
Because I will be the only face
In the darkness of death
So good night
Sweet dreams
Live happily without me
          
           Sincerly,
               Robert Guerrero
               12-12-12

It's full of pain, lose, disease,
Anger, hatred, and poverty
If I missed something oh well
Every corner I turn there it is
Another thing trying to bring me down
But still I refuse to bow
I contemplate my demise
Every little detail
How deep to cut my wrist
How tight the nuse will be
What caliber of gun I will use
My life is hell
No sense in dying
When I'll just be here for all eternity
No rest for me
Just a life always meant to be ******
FML

i can't take back
the tears i never shed
just like i can't
take back all the evil
i have commited

the tears i never shed
have lead to my demise
because the world is black
the hearts are cold
that's what i've been told
when i refuse to fold

with the tears i never shed
we never look back
we can't go back
there is no hope

nobody knows
how the tears i never shed
changed the plans for my demise
now the tears i never shed
will bury me six feet below

as death takes me
the tears i never shed
become the tears i refused to shed
and the broken become the strong

poems
my friends my family
the only thing i have to help
when im lost and have no one to turn to
i grab my only hope for survival
this cruel world ruined me

poems
my own counselor and consultant
i have been cursed with evil emotions
yet i harness them in my poems
hopeing for them to leave my soul

poems
always there for me to write
always there for me to enjoy
my only means of entertainment
unless i watch the blood flow

poems
my key to a world unknown
my adventure on this wretched planet
unchained and ready to ****
my last poem still unwritten

poems
still in all of us
like an unknown power
a single poem could save humanity
but still they remain lost to poetry

poems
our last hope to rescue us from the dark
our light at the end of the tunnel
can we really let it go
we thrive to let our emotions know
our lives are not a show

poems
releasing us from the currents
having faith in the poets
the made us who we are today
look in the mirror and write a poem

poems
are the end of the apocalypse
we ended a war inside of us
hoping to end the war in humanity

poems
our own savior from the chains
our master of words
elegant in nature
and true in your words

poems
you steal the air in my lungs
you stop my heart
you are the one we love
dont hide from us

poems
the truth untold
and today you are told
the path you have paved is the one i shall stay on

what are lies
do they hold the truth somewhere
do they hide the truth
are they the key to saving a mans sanity

dont lie to me
dont lie to the eastern winds
dont lie to the face in the mirror
you cant hide the truth forever

why do we tell lies
do we hate each other that much
are we common enemies
what the hell is wrong with us

lies bring devastation
they bring exctinction
our death written in the sands
unwritten by the truth

we tell lies as we walk the earth
no man is honest
he walks with a mask on
he tells false stories

he captivates
then erradicates
making you wish you never existed
lies bringing on the shadows

earth is the prise
inherited by demons
hells wrath known to mankind
nothing to save us but the truth

tell more lies
let the truth in this world be unknon
savage and ruthless beings
your blood on thier hands

makes you sick dont it
knowing you got no time
to tell the truth
thats what lies are
realization that your dead either way!

it sent me to hell
it sent me to die
it made me lie
i try to keep it in a cell

it wont let me sleep
it wont leave me alone
it has an eerie moan
it made girls weep

it wont **** just me
now its black as night
never to see light
its a criminal to be

it plays a dangerous game
now it sick and twisted
their souls are listed
leaving me full of shame

my dangerous heart
i cant trust it now
its killing me inside
as i try to hide
for i will not bow

death shall come sweet
the pain is endless
im totaly mendless
as i listen to its beat

Pray to a god
Pray for mercy
Pray like a *****
Whos life Im ending

Nothing can save you
From the very monster
Your hatred created
Your rage fed
Just pray for whatever

In the end
Your life is within myy hands
Your heart somewhere off in the distance
In the hands of a girl
Who may have not love you anymore

Pray to whoever
Pray to be heard
Pray for a savior
Pray like a *****
Because your life is over

Pistol to your temple
Hands shaking
As the whiskey goes down
Wrist bleeding
Might as well say a prayer

No god as your shephard
No love at your funeral
No tears when you die
Just another day
That everybody will forget

Look up and meet my face
Look up into these eyes
Do they look familiar?
Because its a reflection of yourself
Going crazy from it all

Pray now
Pray for whatever
Pray not to die
Pray you *******
Pray for the last time

Nothing can save you
So pick up the phone
Make your last call
Call that girl
Who you gave your heart to

Maybe her voice
Will calm your demons
Silence the voices
Echoing in your head
That you want to scatter all over the walls

Do you really think
That she loves you
She wont even pick up the phone
She doesnt want to talk
To your pathetic ***

Listen to me
Im you
Face to face
No hallucination
Just a reflection

Im everything you are
Im alive
Yet Im dead
Im whatever I wish
So come on and pray

No one will hear it
No one will answer
Just make the attempt
Or pull the trigger
Because your wasting my time

Pray to her
Pray for her
Pray to be loved
Pray just pray
Like a *****

Come on together
We can pull the trigger
End each other
Yet we are one
So take another shot

This could be
What saves us
This bullet
These open wrist
That appear to never to run dry

She broke your heart once
So you kept breaking it
And you know
Just as well as I
You dont deserve anything

This moment
Is your last
So say a prayer
And pray for your right
To deserve anything other than death

Dont bother praying
I'll pull the triger for us
So I can rest in peace
And never see your
Weak and pathetic face ever again

I know its hard
To love a demon
I know its hard
To cry for me
So when I end it
Dont say you loved me
Dont shed a tear
For I had no fear
When I pulled the trigger

I know its hard
To let people go
I know its hard
To hold on forever
So when I go
Dont try to save me
Dont try to hold on
For I made the decision
When I slit my wrist

Lurking in the shadows
Street lights not touching your face
Hood up
Knife gripped tight
As you stalk her every move

Like a snake
Slithering into position
Coiled and ready to strike
Aiming for the purse
Willing to take more

You stalked her for weeks
Watching her walk
Her daily routine
Learning how many steps
She makes a day

As your moment draws near
Adrenaline rushing
Stalking her for this moment
To **** and **** her
Just because she broke your heart

You creep closer
Closer and closer
Not wanting to do this
But if you can't have her
No one shall

With this 45 I release myself
From the chains of my self-control
From the walls of my prison
From the pains of my past
From the halls of my emptiness

With this blade I release myself
From the poison of my veins
From the evil of my deeds
From the darkness of my insanity
From the pits of my hell

******* humanity
I have failed all your test
Refused to break down
And bow before anyone
Like a pathetic *** *****

You all look down upon me
Thinking to yourself
I'm no better than you
But I'm stronger
Because I don't live on my knees

Under these stars
That dance in your eyes
Under the full moon
While it whispers a sensual lullaby
Let's make love

Not caring if the owls
Wish to spread the word
Or if the wolves howl
Echoes from the mountains
Let's make love

Express out eternal emotions
Let the adrenaline
And the closeness
Bring forward a torrent of passion
Let's make love

Lady Death
You walk beside me everyday
You make my hell
So much sweeter
I look forward
To walking with you in death
I'll never be truly alone
My wrist cut open
And at the end of this barrel
Lays my first class ticket
To join hands with you
And walk an eternity
Loving each others complete darkness

I walked this road for so long
It's been 16 years
Since I have rested
Feels like I've been tested
For all these years
This highway I walk
Has many shadows
Too many twist and turns
Every car that passes by
Just zooms right on by
As vultures stalk above
I grow weary
Would it be easier to end my life
Or just see if this road
Is a dead end highway
Every step is impossible
Every second is unbearable
I walk carrying the tools
To finish what this highway started
I walk and walk
Passed graves
Homeless people begging for money
Passed lovers kissing
Passed newlyweds
Passed mattress stores
And I know I walk this highway alone
No one to hold my hand
No one to stop my feet
No one
Not a soul
Not a heart
Nothing to save me
Before I create the end
To this god forsaken highway
I will force myself
To meet the end

I don't know what to do
What to write
My mind is just a blur
Fog has rolled in
Stripping my vision
Leaving only silhouettes
Of ideas based on guesses
This fog needs to be lifted
To let the world see
My decayed and rotting flesh
Covering bones so fragile
For without a heart
I am no more alive
Than the corpses
Within 16th century graves

I say goodbye
I say farewell
I say **** It
Just for now
This is my last poem


I'M ON VACATION

You know that feeling
Like life just aint worth it
Like love is just killing you
Well when your deceased
Write me a letter from the grave
Because Im already dead
Through and through
So I'm through
Don't bother marking my grave
Because I met it
Not long after my heart
Which died ages ago

From this prison
From these chains
From this hell
From this life
Release me

I beg of you
Rip my eyes away
I wish to see no more
All this blood and death

From this pain
From this hatred
From this curse
From this emptiness
Release me

I beg of you
Rip my ears away
I wish to hear no more
All these screams and weeps
That echo in every corner

From this earth
From this history
From these walls
From this rage
Release me

I beg of you
Rip my arms away
I wish to feel no more
All these scars and fresh wounds
That dress this body

From this everything
From this universe
From this pity
From this uselessness
Release me

I beg of you
Rip my tongue away
I wish to taste no more
All this blood and flesh
That I feed my inner demons

Just release me
From it all
All the memories
I torture myself with
Please anyone, somebody?

I beg of you
Rip my nose away
I wish to smell no more
All the decaying and rotted corpse
That cover this apocalyptic world

Now do you understand
Why I ask of you
To release me
And free whats left of me

I never told you
How much I really loved you
or how much I really did care
That is my biggest mistake

I would do anything for you
Even lay down my life
In place of yours
Without a moments hesitation

I never told you
How stupid I felt around you
Or how you took my breath away
And I regret not telling you

But if I told you now
Would you believe me
Would it even matter
You don't love the same way

My emotions for you
Will never be returned
So what do I do with them
When they serve me no purpose

I never told you
How beautiful you were
Or how your eyes sparkled
When I had so many chances too

I hate those opportunities
That I regrettably passed up
I wish I could go back
But it wouldn't change a thing

Your gone now
I'm here alone
With useless emotions
And a hollow chest

I never told you
How special you were to me
Or that you deserved so much better
Than who you were falling for

I can't forgive myself for that
And every scar I gave myself
Is a reminder
Of how stupid I was

I never told you
That I had to force myself
Just to say one thing in front of you
Because you left me speechless

Would you even listen
Would you believe me
WOULD YOU EVEN CARE
If I tried to tell you now

There's a target on my hollow chest...TAKE THE SHOT!!!

Just yesterday we were laughing
You were smiling
Happily in my arms
As we told each other
How deep we were in love

What the hell happened
To those days
Because it all felt like yesterday
But this morning
The world crumbled
Under a single breath

What the hell happened
To wanting an us
To knowing and understanding
The pain we have
And miserable past we had
But just for another day
I would like those days back

The one thing I wish to do
Is burden myself
With the pain of others
Rid this wretched world of it
Letting it die with me
Just a dream I guess
Something I thought
As I watched
The pain grow
And graves being dug
Something I thought
As I read another poets poem
Just a dream I guess
Yet I don't want it to be a dream
But a reality
I wish to someday come true

Simple question right?
Wrong!
You have to have something
If not anything
Before you can say
Your thankful for it
What are you thankful for?
Me?
I'm only thankful for my poetry
And the many readers
Even those who understand
What I'm talking bout in my poetry

Your not within my reach
Your just a fantasy
But when I touch you
It's like pure ecstasy

I hate you
I want to slit your throat
But only if you had one
Your dead to me

You left a hollowness in me
You made me bleed
Your just a dream I had
Now I hate you

I gave you so much
You took everything
Like a greedy thief
And then abandoned me

I HATE YOU!!!
How much blood do you want?
Your a dangerous game I played
Where the winner is always you

I'm not good enough for you
I sound like a *****
Know this: I can't cry
But I hope you choke on all the blood


I HATE LOVE!!!

Would you sit with me?
Will you listen?
To my story
To my tales of heartache
To my fantasy of finding love

Will you listen?
To what I have to say
Or judge me
And just walk away
With a look of disgust

Would you sit with me?
Will you listen?
To the words of wisdom
To my problems
To my cries

Will you listen?
To what I have to say
Or disregard me
And just walk away
With pity in your eyes

Sure I may be homeless
Had it all
Lost in a moment to greed
Will you listen?
Before it happens to you

I don't need your sympathy
Your pity or disgust
Just an ear
For even a minute
I'm not asking for much

Will you listen?
So my wisdom
Will be passed on
Like a genetic code
So I can lay myself to rest

I doubt you will
You just walk past me
On these cold heartless streets
Throwing change my way
Thinking I need it more than you

I need nothing more
Than someone willing to listen
Just for a minute
It's my dying wish
Will you listen?

Of coming to your rescue
Of picking up the pieces
To your desolate heart

I'm tired of being there for you
When you continue to try and end it
When your crying
And wanting to be held

You drink and sulk
You cut and sit
In the puddles of pity and blood
I'm tired of this game

Just end it already
I'm not going to be there
So let me rest
And don't call me again

The homeless,
The weak,
The poor,
The sick,
The dying,
The old,
The wise,
The young,
The stupid,
The rageful,
The pained,
The distraught,
The broken,
The suicidal,
The empty,
This is for you all
A toast
Another shot of whiskey
Another hit of ****
Just because we survived
SALUD!!!

Would you cry over my lifeless body?
Would your hands be covered in my blood?
Would you show for my funeral?
Would you try to revive me?
If my wrist were wide open
Would you stitch them shut
If the nuse was tight around my neck
Would you cut it from me
If I would of called the moment
Before I decided to end it
Would you be standing over my grave?
If it all ended for me
What would you do?
How would you react to the news?

I'm no William Shakespeare
Or Edgar Allan Poe
I'm just the average
Insane guy who's in love

I'm no Vincent van Gogh
Or Leonardo de Vinci
I'm just the guy
Who's art keeps him somewhat sane

I'm no one special
Or going to be
But I'm the guy
With a heart made just for her

Every word in every poem
I've ever written about love
Was just for her
And some were dark I know

Every line in every drawing
I've ever drawn with her name
Was a memory for her
Because I know I'll fade and die

Just one day
All I dream of
Is to be able to call her mine
To hold her and love her

I would give anything
To kiss her
To say I love her
And share this love with her

But everything I want to do
Every memory I want to create
I can only make
With a pencil and a piece of paper

I will never have a chance
To really create those moments
Or indulge in her beauty
I just have to look at it from a distance

I'm the guy
No one knows about
Or even bothers to know
I'm the one fading and dying alone

I told the world this before
I'm a no body
My poetry can't define me
Because usually it's not me I'm writing about

You read my poems
You messaged me
You listened to my problems
You could relate to me
And all I can say is thank you

You really understand
Your poetry speaks to me
Like my poetry speaks to you
Your cool as hell
So again thank you

This poem is for you
Hope you enjoy
Because really
All I can say to you right now
Is simply THANK YOU!!!!

You don't know what it means to me
Coming from a broken home
And learning there is someone
Who comprehends everything
Even my crazy *** philosophy's

Here you lie
Naked next to me
My arm wrapped gently around you
Your head resting on my chest

Your breathing is slow
Your finger tracing my scars
Your eyes lost in despair
I wish to end

This moment is better than the first
I was able to show my love
But now it lingers in the air
As we hold each other in this perfect moment

You look up to meet my eyes
We kiss and say "I love you"
Never wanting to let this die
Because we both are at peace

My heart I want to tear out
And give to you
My love I want to express again
As your body tenses as I begin

I hate you
I cant say I want to love you
So why cant I forget you?
**** this ****
Im sick of it

You played my emotions
Like a **** fiddle
Well the strings broke
And Im not letting you fix me
Im saying **** it

You thought I could take it
You just didnt know how much
Well now you do
When I let the demon rage
And snap your pathetic neck

**** it
You hear me now mother?
I'll scream it at the top of my lungs
Till you finally hear this
******* and DIE!!!

Sure you ruined me
You even looked at me when I was young
And simply said ''**** it''
Well its my turn to say it
With your throat in my hands

You love me now mother
Well I still hate you
I will never love you
Someday I'll take these memories
And make you choke on them

It wasnt enough for you
To say you hated me
You had to reach into my chest
Pick out the pieces of my heart
And let them bleed at my feet

It wasnt enough for you
To say you never loved me
You had to take the remnants of my sanity
Break it into tiny pieces
To the point you couldnt break it further

It wasnt enough for you
To walk out that door
Saying "*******" on the way out
Giving me the finger
And telling me to **** myself

It wasnt enough for you
Everytime I layed in puddles for you
Everytime I wrapped myself around your pinky
And pleased you better then any other man before me
But you wanted something I couldnt give

It wasnt enough for you
You just had to comeback
****** because you realized
You really did love me
You really found yourself missing my llove and affection

It wasnt enough for you
That you couldnt comprehend
That I got over you and moved on
So you had to pull out the pistol
The very one I gave you for your birthday

It wasnt enough for you
To watch my new girlfriend plead for her life
But blow her brains out all over the walls
Screaming and crying "Why did you do that?"
Knowing already the reason I moved on

It wasnt enough for you
That you decided to end your life
Right here in front of me
But not before you took a shot at me
Knowing I would die not long after you

You knew I still loved you
But you wouldnt listen to me
You just continued to wave that gun around
It wasnt enough for you
That you made sure our last moments were with each other

i was everything to her
i was her immortal guard
i was the demon at arms
i was her worst nightmare
i was the wind in her hair

i was the monster of legend
i was the man without a face
i was the shadow in the corner
i was the reason for the tears on her pillow
i was the reason she pulled the trigger

i was worhtless
i was broken and bruised
i was the killer of her sanity
i was just another voice
i was the one who took everything

i was wreckless and selfish
i was weak and scared
i was her savior from her pain
i was her shoulder to lean on
now i am laid to rest
buried with her blood on my hands

weeping willow tears
heavy and warm
drowning herself
for the pain sge has watched

many years have passed
now a river flows
where the weeping willow stood
she lays at the bottom
still she cries

a heavy burden it is
as she watched young girls
fall victim to loves dangerous game
"No Mercy" love yelled
as the weeping willow began to cry

weeping willows tears
powerful and moving
drowning the village
with words unspoken

no more will the weeping willows tears fall
for she lays in peace
with love finally falling victim
to his own dangerous game
now peace is restored
to the weeping willows eyes

I’ll stand beside her
Never leaving it
I’ll fight for her
Even as I grow weak
Till the last breath
I will be her infinite guard

I’ll hold her close
Never letting go
I’ll love her forever
Even as my heart slows
Till the last breath
I will be unmoving

I’ll stand tall like goliath
I’ll stand strong like titans
I’ll stand ready like soldiers
Waiting for anything aiming to hurt her
Till the last breath
I will be ready for it all

When I told her I loved her
She shrugged it off
Like I was lying to her
But as I stand here
At the front lines
Ready to spill my blood at a moments notice
She realizes the truth behind my words

Till the last breath
Of a dying age
My battle cries will echo
And my blood will wet the sand
Forever will I be there for her
Never leaving even in death

I’ll treat her with love and respect
Without a single flaw
I’ll be her punching bag
Without showing fatigue
Till the last breath
My heart and soul will be hers

Its the world I go to
When all my love is rejected
When everything fails
When my best friends fail to guide me
Out of this dark place Im in
So I just grab a bottle
Drink till the pain is gone
Jumping straight into a drunken wastland

I called each of them six times
Trying to get this off my chest
But each and everyone of them rejected my call
So here I am
Bottle in hand
Trying to find the path
To a drunken wasteland
That I missed for so long

I attempted suicide nine times today
Failed each time
So Ill just drown my pain and sorrows
Till the world itself becomes nonexistant
This drunken wasteland is a peaceful place
Really there are no worries and no more pain
Just people who have ruined lives as well
People who truely understand what Im going through

I just wish when I leave this place
That I could breath
Stick my head in the clouds
And find peace for once
Dont I deserve some kind of heaven
In this **** hell
When everything is the same
I just run and hide in a drunken wasteland

If so how much?
Would you die for me?
Would you put down the drugs?
Would you answer my questions?
Would you answer them truthfully?
Do you love me?

I dont know why I ask
You cant hear me
Your dead to me
You died when you walked away
Leaving me in soiled diapers
Hungry and crying

How else am I suppose to feel?
Why did you do it?
Was it easy?
When were you goiong to comeback?
Do you love me?
Or are you just bullshiting me?

Whats the point of this?
Always feeling ander and hate
Pain is the reasons for them
Because Im still that lost kid
Still looking for his mother
But she's passed out on the couch

Did you try to quit?
Did you really want me?
Was I even important?
Do you know anything about me?
What were you thinking?
Were you thinking at all?

Your nothing to me now
Just the woman who gave me life
I dont have to love you
Or waste my time with you
You dont know me
And I dont care to learn anymore about you

Do you love me?
Did you ever?
Is my father my real father?
Did you decieve him as well?
What did I ever do to you?
Is my life worth living as your son?

You lied to me
You decieved my siblings
You tainted my world
And ruined my heart
Im sick of you
So for once tell me the truth

No more questions
Because I know you wont answer them
Your pathetic you know that
You dont love and never did
So why bother
Thinking about you everyday?

Its sweeter than pure sugar
More than a normal heart
Could possibly contain
Your love my dear
I dont deserve

Its addicting like ******
My own legal drug
The highs are better
Than taking someones innocence
And ruining another life

Your love
Its pure and untainted
You whisper it in my  ear
As I hold you close
Slowly stripping your body

Your love
Gives my heart an *******
As if your soft skin under my hands
Gives my body one
Both of which I want you to enjoy

Your love
Sets my heart and soul on fire
A new flame for this old wick
A warmth I havent felt in so long
A cure for my desolate broken heart

Your love
I wish I could comprehend
Its more than I can possibly bare
But will return proudly
Because I know its true

Your naked body
Close to mine
I embrace
As our bodies meet
Showing each other the affection we share

Here I stand
Looking at people
Mourning over the death
Of a son or daughter
Another victim to suicide
Another forgotten soul

They say she was happy
They say he was perfectly fine
But how would they know
They didnt know what was going on
Behind thier eyes
But does it look like it now
The proof is before your eyes

Take a closer look
Your son wasnt perfectly fine
Your daughter wasnt happy
They hid themselves from you
Afraid of your disappointment
Lost to thier depression
Having no one to turn to

So they jumped on the blade
Cutting themselves at night
Getting high off the pain
No drugs or alcohol needed
You were to busy in the kitchen
Fighting over whatever you wanted

Remember when they were little kids
After you read them a bedtime story
You would say
I will never let anything happen to you
But now its just an empty promise
As you mourn over thier lifeless body
Cursing the heavens for taking them from you

But it was your selfish actions
You never read thier poetry
You never seen their drawings
Nose deep in work
Not taking time to listen
Dont you regret it now

Its not just your son or daughter in that coffin
Its a soul soon to be forgotten
Thier memory wont live on forever
Just a victim of suicide
Someone no one was around to hear
Another forgotten soul
Again buried six feet below our feet

Help her
Save her
Someone hear her
Shes begging
Shes on her knees hoping
For someone to set her free

Shes drowning in fear
Not sure if she will survive
He told her so many lies
That her heart now dies
Slowly with every step
He takes as he walks out the door

Help him
Save him
Somebody hear him
Hes begging
Hes on his knees crying
Because no one love him

Hes always searching for something
Turning up lost
Only found when he opens up his eyes
Hes terrified of each step
Wanting to live
Knowing he will die in due time

Help them
Save them
Somebody hear them
Thier begging
Thier on thier knees praying
For a life perfect for them

They are miles apart
Knife close to thier wrist
Nuse happily around thier necks
Bottle already empty
If only they knew each other
They could of lived that perfect life
Loving each other while being free
But together unknowingly they die

With this life
With this sorrow
With this anger
With this hatred
With this self-pity
Im done with it all

I dont want to live anymore
Nothing left to see
My aching bones
Rusty and crumbling now
Cant your god just let me die
And fade into the background of a fleeting memory

Im done with it all
Tired of trying to please
All these arrogant people
Who continue to think
They know anything about me
But they only know my name

Im done with it all
Trying to acccomplish something
Thats better off as a dream
But whats the point of giving up now
When Im so close to obtaining it
**** it Im done for the last time

You pushed and pushed
I was the one who fell
You werent the one
Trying to face their fears
Standing alone in the middle of a road
Wondering which direction to go

Im done with it all
Sick and tired of waking from nightmares
Wondering if everytime I wake
If its all just a never ending dream
Trying to find something to believe in
Only finding a finger given by the heavens

Im done with it all
Trying to find a place to call home
Only finding an empty house
With people souless and uncaring
Quick to turn thier back
Not even trying to embrace a son

Do you hear me world
Im done trying to please you
Trying to find my place
So Im going to dig my grave
And watch you beg me
Not to end all of this

Watch me now world
Take this dusty 45
And this rusty blade
Curl up at the bottom of a bottle
And live free one last time
Before I bleed this life out

Do you feel like
You would be better off without me
Im done asking unaswerable questions
You wouldnt tell me
Even if you had the answer
So I will say goodnight and goodbye

I wont miss it at all
Hear me now
Under the ringing off a 45
Im done straining my voice
Going horse from over worked muscles
One last time I will say IM DONE!!!!

Just like my heart...blank
Just like my soul...empty
A blank page poem
A mirror image of myself
I hope your happy now
This is what you did to me