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rachel Dec 2019
honey baby cherry pie
i've loved you since i caught your eye
but that was months and months ago
as winter passed i thought the same
in the spring out in the rain
with droplets running down my face i realized that
i'm lovesick
spend everyday and all night
waiting for you to see me
waiting for you to come through the door
waiting for you to come home
there's hearts coming out of me
bliss is surrounding me
lovesick
oh i'm lovesick
this was a melody that came into my head but i'm not a musician, so here's the lyrics
rachel Oct 2019
i don't write poetry anymore
i sit in my room, naked, feeling the curves of my body, searching for a sort of foreign peace within them
i study for exams, begin books i never finish, watch movies and stop halfway through, wear the same pants three days in a row, go a week without washing my hair
i lay down in the grass and watch the sky move
i laugh, i smile, i talk with friends
i feel alive driving in my car, letting the spring wind blow through my growing hair
i celebrate my mom's birthday, mother's day, memorial day
i go to baseball games and wear perfume
i play the only song i know on the piano when i should be practicing the flute
i stand in the shower and think too long and too hard
i pick fights with my dad because i can
i imagine my future, peering around the invisible bends in my path
(my apartment is beautiful, the one in my head, in case you were wondering)
i travel down 35W to see my family on their farms during harvest, the combines plowing through corn and leaving the fields bare for the snow to blanket in the winter
i sing loudly in church and pray only when i feel like there's something to pray about
i get lost in myself, trying to figure out who i am and where i'm going and what i want, the maze just never seems to end
i realize how much i'm starting to look like my mother-- my eyes, my cheeks, my nose are all bits and pieces that i got from her
i don't write poetry anymore
life has gotten too busy
life has gotten too hard
this poem has been in the process of being made since february, and it sat in my notes app for quite some time before i realized that i could make something beautiful out of it.
i've been dormant on here for a long time, but i finally feel like i'm in a place to start sharing again ;)
rachel Feb 2019
it's kind of crazy, the way people come into your life and change you.
when i met her i didn't think right off the bat,
"this girl is gonna be my best friend."
but time wore like it does and, like humans do, we grew closer.
a bond formed by a shared distaste for egg rolls, rap, and similar schedule.
so tonight when she called me, crying and breaking, something i could see and sense without her saying a word, i knew that
if this girl can trust me
then i can trust her.
for better or for worse.
rachel Feb 2019
you can't shake hands and greet people with a smile through a wall.
rachel Feb 2019
there's this boy in my class who can move through water like a raindrop through summer air, though his eyes are brown like the ground on which he walks.
he is an ocean with currents and waves and groundswells, all waiting to drag me up and send me crashing into him.
i've always been a good swimmer, was even on a team once, but his water is pushing and pulling and putting its hands on my waist and neck, tangling in my hair, telling me to trust him.
but how do i trust if i've never been in love before?
how do i give myself to someone and expect to get every penny back?
do i have the time (is he worth the time) to count every coin and weigh for counterfeits?
is part of falling in love taking the risk of not getting everything returned?
can i come out of love unchanged?
or is change a part of love?
i know that you took mythology as an elective last trimester because i saw you in the library and was trying not to stare so let me tell you the story of icarus.
he fell.
hard.
he had wings fashioned from wax and feather and did not heed his father's warnings, flying too close to the sun, touching salvation with his fingertips, only to fall into the unforgiving sea.
if i am icarus and you are the sea then who is the sun?
is love personified within the sun in our myth, something that you must fall away from in order to fall into?
is love the enemy or the goal, something to obtain?
is there a reward for the fall?
is the reward love?
do i need to love (or even merely like) in order to meet you face to face somewhere out of school, coffee maybe?
or a movie?
i hear there's a new one out about a girl afraid of love.
to be loved.
to give love.
to accept love.
does seven work for you?
sorry i know that this is a bit of a rollercoaster of a poem
rachel Feb 2019
with each day that slowly trickles by
i try not to give up on the hope of the
effervescent tomorrow
rachel Feb 2019
the right side of my mattress has caved in on itself
a not so tiny crater in the shape of me
a rough outline of my contours
and i wonder
for a fleeting moment
if your bed has the same problem
only on the left
- i like your name even though no one calls you by it (i will)
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