Of course it isn't easy, one feels the living dread. Coming out the other side is like digging though layers of black lead. Going to the depths of the levels, is a calling to be, born again.
Building a new foundation, while living in two worlds of hell, takes strength and great endurance. The ego has such a hard shell.
I struggled with the habit of responding
'Twas the hardest part of it all
For I had become mechanical
Like a clock ticking on the wall.
Carrying out an investigation, a thousand voices in my head. Chastising the negative chatter, you silly twit, stupid you,
you got it wrong, again.
I continued on deconstructing
I practiced being wide awake
Watching the slow mutation
Showing me this pityless state.
Something began to happen
I Imagined a golden light
I began to feel whole and happy
Forgetting the terrible blight.
'Twas through this understanding
The path opened up very wide
I felt such love and compassion
For all who were on this ride.
The biggest lie I discovered
Was that I was born with sin
I got rid of this very notion
And the real me emerged from within.
And people stared with wonder
That I had become so new
I had torn the old me asunder
And celebrated my debut.
Some days I find myself wandering into one of these states again. It doesn't take much to remember the pain of breaking the shell .
Truth is a constant reminder -
" To return to my heart instead."
A new world... love trust heart.
I saw it in the window as I was passing by.
The beauty and the colours completely caught my eye. I stood and took a moment to bring my own self back, to watch the nature of desire and catch it in the act.
Drawn like a moth to flame I stepped inside the door. Taking in the atmosphere admiring the decor. With a sense of AWE wanting to explore, the colors in this garment, made my senses soar.
I just knew I loved it and love takes many forms
I touched it with my fingers felt the sensation all the more. Gold, silver blue threads shimmered in the light, this truly was a work of art, of that I had no doubt.
I had to try this garment, the call came from my soul. A memory of something I couldn't ignore. I pondered on this feeling and brought it to the fore. A feeling of bliss came flooding from the core.
Wow! it felt so beautiful it fit me like a glove.
Stepping from the dressing room I felt the creators love. Beauty has its glory, I truly felt at home. Beauty is within, I am never alone.
The assistant she walked towards me with an eye as sharp as mine. "You know, this was designed" she said, "especially for your kind. She didn't need to make a pitch, she saw the appreciation in my eyes.
I stood before the mirror and I twirled all around. I studied every angle but no fault could be found. It seemed to me perfection so I will wear it proud.
Because I already know; " I am” the treasure to be found.
A day in town was the cause of this poem.
So I bought the garment and wrote this poem.
Very enjoyable purchance .
Than you my friends .
He carves words he has spoken
Of promises unbroken
whispering into the dark
Chiselling delicately into her bones
With tobacco juice to bring out the tones
Quietly engraving symbols and psalms
Living for the night
Working through to the light
Communing only through dreams
In daylight she's secure
Inside a white Alder tree
Protected and respected
Her spirit flies free