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Wyatt 5d
I'm not angry because
I have nothing to say
I'm terrified because
I have too much to say.

When I lock that door
another being comes out of me
and I can't help but let it out.
I remove my mask, remove my way
and adopt something new to you.
Turn away from the screens
'cause they never helped you.
Close your ears to the world
'cause it never embraced you.
Lost in space, just taking up space.
I can't find my direction
without crash landing
in the backyard of your life.
It's like I made a large crater there
but you pay it all no mind.

I'm not angry because
I have nothing to say
I'm terrified because
I have too much to say.
No way to be known,
all this time I've been alone
'cause I chose to be unknown.
Tell me, where are you now,
now that I'm gone?
Wyatt Oct 5
I have nothing
and I know no one.
All I’m waiting for
is my time to go.
Nothing to give
and nothing to gain,
the last things I enjoy
are being taken away.
They don’t really
want me to be happy
they just want to be
the ones to give it out.
They pat me
on the shoulder
in a patronizing way
while they laugh at me
behind my back.
What’s the point
of putting up with
this life that I
never asked to have?
Why was I born?
Just to agonize
every second?
I have nothing left to give
to a world that’s
already taken everything.
I don’t know what else to say.
My dreams are dead.
Wyatt Sep 16
Yeah, I'm broken.
Yeah, I've changed.
Yeah, you don't know me anymore.
I hear you listing off
everything you thought I was
but none of it is clicking for me.
Don't jump to conclusions,
you've just been living in delusion.

These years have come
and they have passed me by
and now you get the privilege
of standing on ground so high
as you double down on me.
You hold the moral compass
right inside of your hands,
but little did you know that
you're the farthest from an angel.
But please, do tell me
about how worthless I am.
Please, tell me.

Yeah, I'm not liked.
Yeah, I've got no fight.
Yeah, you don't need me anymore.
I see your disappointed face
when I don't give what you want
but why am I considering you
in the first place?
Yeah, I've been lost
for such a long time
and if I'm being honest,
you were one of the reasons.
If I'm just like Eve,
then you're the serpent itself.
If I'm the angel who's fallen
then you're the devil himself.
I've got nothing to regret.
If I die right now,
at least I was real.

I hear you listing off
everything you thought I was
but none of it is clicking for me.
Yeah, you don't know me anymore.
Wyatt Sep 16
On the way down
I wrote this out.

They gave up on me so quick
that even I gave up on me.
I've heard a lot of things
from all of these people
who I thought were on my side
but now I know that talk is cheap.
So keep talking, keep talking
but it all amounts to nothing.
I won't go down, no I won't go down
unless I'm taking all of you with me.

No hope, no truth, no reason.
There are no boundaries
to what you speaking.
I've been through hell
and I've been through the wringer.
I've seen it all, so it no longer phases me.

You can talk like you know something
but you've never been in my shoes.
What I've been through,
I know most of you
couldn't even begin to take it.
Every nasty look, every step alone,
every shadow that follows me,
every one of your words still echoing,
everybody around's like a knife to me
but the pain is deeper knowing
that you're everybody's enemy.
Condescending, it's sickening
you're all wolves with sheep's skin.
You're holier than thou in public,
but I know what you're really about.
Made out to be somebody I'm not.
Maddening, yeah it's deafening.
You won't put a label on me.
Despite what you say
and despite what you do
I know that in the end
I'm my worst enemy.

On the way down
I wrote this out.
This is the sound
of me firing back.
I won't go down, no I won't go down
unless I'm taking all of you with me.
Wyatt Sep 12
My body gives up on me
by the end of the day
as I land face-first
on this bed of mine.
My mind is still racing
but I feel something
coming over me.
I can barely keep
my eyes open to write this.
Everybody hates me,
I can’t do anything right
and I’ll probably die alone
but right now I’m simply
too tired to care.
Wyatt Aug 19
It'd cost millions in renovations
to make this broken home
inside my head a happy one.
I've got old furniture
blocking up the front door,
I can barely see any sunlight
shining through the blinds.
Boxes of stuff
I haven't touched
for years lining up
near the basement floor.
I've got memories
that I want to stay memories
and I've got stuff nobody wants,
you could call them
cheap hand-me-downs.
People get high and mighty
while wearing name-brand
when they're growing up,
testing the limits of their control,
what lives they can touch.
Once we fall on our faces
we learn something though,
the issue is some people
don't fall on their face enough.
I've got memories,
that I wish I could
burn in an endless fire.
We've got enemies,
enemies that we wouldn't have
if we acted just a bit brighter.
I let them get to me,
let it all get in my head.
Give them love despite hate
or give them anger instead?
This place is all messed up,
and I don't think
I'm gonna change it up
any time soon.
I've got memories that I want
to stay distant memories.
I've got stuff stored away
deep inside my head
and I won't ever show you
but you can have a lie instead.
I've got memories
that I wish were found dead
but the issue is
you can't **** what is invisible,
there can be no red.
Looking back on my life,
it's been more miserable for me,
like these upside down frowns
I wore to get through the day.
All you see is what
I meant for you to see,
not the broken home that
represents my everything to me.
In retrospect
there's so much I could change today,
but bad memories can only be inspected
once the damage is made.
I think about all those times
I was alone in a room,
covered up in the dark
thinking about impending doom.
Memories like these
have decorated my life
and they've designed who I am
so when I think about them
I can't help but desire to burn them
because I can't stand who I am today.
Still, I've got this stuff stored away
in the corners of my head,
no I won't ever show them
but you can have a lie instead.
Wyatt Aug 12
guess I'm different.
If I changed myself, I know
that it'd make no difference
because I know you'd still find
something to change about me.
you always complain
about things you don't understand
like variety in this world is a problem.
You don't listen, you laugh
and you scoff at the others
because they love something else.
Your mind isn't open,
it's almost like a black hole
that ***** everything in,
never to return to us.
guess I'm different
but I can't apologize
for being myself
because what can I believe in
if it isn't my own?
can call me
weird or strange
but to me
you're the one
who's weird
and you're the one
who needs to change.
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