There is blood on the horizon
let the blood bath begin
let the blood sink in
Washing is futile
you soak in the blood of those who have fallen before you
does it change you?
the DNA of others
mixing with yours
Who are you?
I don't know you anymore

You can't see past yourself
Blind to the ways of others,
You stumble and fall.

You reach and fall.
Your way
Will fail.

I remember the time you stood outside my door
in a suit and tie and asked my parents for permission to take me out

I remember the flowers you gave me
and the smile on your face
and the way your eyes glistened in the pale glow of the moon

I remember the scent of you and the cliche romantic gestures
I assured you you didn't have to do, but you said that a lady deserves a gentleman

I remember that was the first day my scars were visible
and I was so afraid you would be disgusted and angry

I remember your hands travelling up my arms and tracing over the marks
red, raised, recent

I remember you telling me
I was the most beautiful thing you've ever seen
and I remember how you held me as I cried
because no one had ever cared before
not ever

It must have been love
To sweep me away to a place
where fears face the light
inner reality no longer weighed so much
you took me there
Thank you

You have slipped from my hands
You have fallen into the dark
You will never be mine
You will never know how much I love you
You won't ever know me
But my heart will beat for you.

With each beat of my heart I hear the sound of the train.
It shouts at me, so do the voices.
My head can't choose, which to listen to,
The train wants me to move,
My heart wants me to stay.
Each beat draws the train closer,
leading me to the end,
the end of the line, the tracks only lead one way,
the last beat, the last breath I will breathe.
My heart beats no more, my lungs expand and contract for the last time.
Dying is so simple for a person so small.