I curl up into a ball
buds molded in my ears
and cry to the beat of the music
My wound filled tears
I try emptying myself
Of this anguish
of this pain
of this desire
to be consumed by darkness
because I know
I truly am afraid
and no matter what you say
Baby, it won't go away.
I'm drifting
and I hear it in my head
you saying "its going to be okay"
and how all I could do
was push you away
Feeling in that exact moment
my heart beginning to break
I grab hold of my beating chest
the musics ringing now
and as the lyrics
fill my head
of a song about love saying
every word of how it feels inside
I melt
deep into the wrinkles
of my faded sheets
and lose myself a little more
just as every other time I weep.

When your head gets stuck in the ground there’s a feeling all around, you’re too tall, too small, too fat or too thin, people judging you everywhere, you never know what tomorrow might bring.  

This feeling inside grips you tight, keeps you awake at night, haunting you till the morning light.  You want to scream loud and true to let everyone know what you’re really going through.

This feeling inside haunts you while you work, it’s always on your mind, everyone just says you’ll be fine, you try to fight it but it just simply won’t be fought

With this feeling inside you never understand who you’re friends are, who they might be, who’s talking behind your back, who’s truly on your side, when will this feeling finally subside?

You’re constantly looking for a route out from this feeling inside, all the while it slowly wears away at your soul, facing it every day is begging to take its toll, this feeling inside comes over like a tidal wave that’ll follow you to your grave.