in the dark depths
of despair i thought
of joining you

aching with grief
as if struck too
i was lost in the
loss of you

but pain doesn't heal
hurt and more death
can't bring us to life

so i carry you inside
because as long
as i love you
you're alive

stop throwing stones of judgement when we are all made of glass

I woke up suddenly at 3am
Disoriented and dizzy
Not sure if from a dream
or nightmare
My eyes scanned the
dark
Trying to reassure myself
of the here and now
My breathing shallow
My body trembling and
covered in a cold sweat
Overcome with the urge to
talk to you like I
use to
A thrumming need to have you
close pulsed beneath
my chilled skin
I sighed and
adjusted for comfort
Tucked NotBob back under my
head
Closed my eyes and calm
breathed myself back
to sleep

There are times I miss
you so much
I wish I remembered where
I placed your memory
Which box
in which dark corner
holds the sound of
your voice
Where did I bury
your smile
and the feeling of your
eyes saying I’m
beautiful
I scattered the ashes of
your burnt words
and on occasion regret
that I didn’t keep
a special three to
visit during my
lonely sleepless
nights
There are times I miss
you so much
I almost go searching
for you