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b Mar 2018
she
and she made me believe she loved me
when she only loved the thought of me
not my entire being, partly my presence
for if she did,
I would be writing diary entries
of bliss and ecstasy
and not short poems
of misery
b Nov 2016
anxiety kills.
it's more dangerous and lethal  
than bullets, knives
for these can only
hurt you, damage you externally
but anxiety
penetrates, spreads
from the inside.
b Oct 2016
The sky cries.  
Its tears fell on my head.
The emptiness i felt.
No words could be said
for I was mute and my heart
was torn into pieces.  

The greyness of the clouds
reflected my soul
which was dark
and was everything but whole.
Colourless 'twas
but the greyness of grey
and blackness of black
were visible.  

Mine heart was crushed
and torn to several pieces.  
They scattered into the abyss.
Mine heart was wrinkled and the creases
were visible.  

The leaves I came across
were fragile, easily torn
like my being so used,
so worn out,
from crying and longing
for mirth and liberty.

Everything I had
slipped through my fingers.  
Easily, they left and were gone.
But not everything left me.
My fears and doubts were still there.
Accompanying me as I walk
down this dark tunnel.

No source of light.  
I couldn't see anything but darkness.
So long, the tunnel was.  
Never-ending, the path was.
With every step I took,
my heart screamed,  
my legs throbbed.

I breathe in and out
but poison entered my lungs
for I feel sick and dizzy
with all the breathing.
It didn't help me
and made me feel worse.

A streak of light, I  could see.  
As I approached it,
emanating from the opposite end,
a cool breeze swept through me.
The smell of rain wafted.  

I remembered it all.  
The reason why I was
in deep lament.
For these thoughts shalt not leave me, impossible to banish.  
The reason why I wanted
to vanish.  

The smell of rain,
the smell of humidity,
took me back.  
I was transported into the past
like a wheel, spinning fast
before my very eyes.

The light neared me.
With much anticipation,
I approached it,  
and the last thing I could remember
was the smell of rain.
b Jul 2016
sometimes i weep
before i sleep

scary thoughts, they peep
oftentimes, they creep

instead of counting sheep
counting monsters that leap

scars are deep
no choice but keep
b May 2016
do not trust
do not expect
because betrayal is all you get.

it's okay to sob
it's okay to cry
after all, it was worth a try.

you will smile
you will laugh
have fun 'till you've had enough

be cold
be strong
because being yourself is never wrong.
b May 2016
solitude is my remedy
the outside world is poison

it contaminates my thoughts
it soils my hopes

there is no freedom
there is no happiness

that's why i prefer my little sanctuary
to that enormous place...

where it offers nothing but the feeling of loneliness

i am not a part of it and never will be
b May 2016
the night sky
reflected my own soul
which was dark

the luminescent stars
reminded me of my small hopes
which were long gone

even a million stars
couldn't even light up the whole sky
without the moon...
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