a stray light
splayed across oak hardwood floor
a girl
wonders
who they are

a girl with a
unique identity
they struggle over finding
out who they are

while they are
accepted for
who they are
they are forgotten

their preferences thrown
out the window in
favor of sticking to
the status quo

in this large world
from the beginning of humans
there have been two types
male and
female

as time goes on
more genders are sprinkled
into the mix
what you're born with is
no longer your identity

let's forget that for a second

even since there were only
two
males have always been
"better"

**** that

we
women
are just as capable

we can swear
we can fight
we can act
we can write
we can lead

we can
we can
we can

so shut up with that *******
"because we're men
we get to do what you can't"

imagine
living in fear
of the person who forces you to love them

imagine
nobody acknowledging
believing
you when you say something
because of what's between your legs

imagine
you being ***** and the person responsible saying
"it's their fault for looking pretty"

we need to stop this now

music
this is my lifeline
50 songs just waiting
to be played
3 hours of bliss

escaping from the
world
and delving deep into my own
created world

i gently tell him my
greatest secret
surprisingly
he believes me and
goes on with his
life

he asks me about the
threads in my vision
and i try to answer

but one question

i cannot answer

in my world of red
everyone has a thread tied
to their pinky finger

sometimes it is a couple
that is connected, the small string
in between not
the only connection

sometimes
and this is most of the time
the string leads elsewhere

in my world of red, i am the
only one without
a thread of fate
tying my destined partner and i
together

except
until i met that certain
green-haired boy

the night is full
of stars

freckled
with millions of stars

i know that
it's my ancestor's fault
that our sky is
hiding the stars
from us

their irresponsibility leading
to the heavy pollution

hiding the stars from us

and yet they are angry at us

you're the one
who's at fault

i want to look at the stars

it would help me
comfort myself

i've only seen pictures

i just want to see a sky full of stars
the indigo void
freckled with the infinite stars that exist

they say
"I believe what I see"
does that mean that i shouldn't
believe in stars?

thank you
for polluting our world
and blaming us

it's you at fault

something
i wish for
is for
someone to love
me

people joke
but there's a twist
they joke about terrible
things

they joke about
suicide and
mental states
why do they do that?

something i want
is for something to just
go my way for
once

i want
for someone to be
kind and
acknowledge me

rain falling outside my window
represents all of
the tears of the world

dripping
and the droplets
of the sky
cling on to trees

like i cling on to hope

suicidal thoughts cloud
my head every day
i always
push
them away

falling into depression
both the suffering
cell-mate and
the cruel jailer

i want the door to swing open
and to be free

but with bad things
repeatedly happening
i don't think it'll open

no friends
school is hell
my sister hates me
my dog doesn't even love me

get out of this hell
maybe live in another world
being a fangirl
that would truly make me happy

because is there anything in this world
that wants me?