Today I asked question
But I do not know to whom
I voiced concern for all the memories and the ever present mood
The one that crushes spirits, more specifically my own
While the barren land I wander has become a horrid home
I haven't told myself the truth, I turn away from day to day
And all the things I do not see they whisper gently so they say
They tell me that I'm gone and that my smile cannot be
they shout that I am wrong and oh so broken don't you see?
But I swear I've known this all along
I've watched the slow descent
Now I'm drowning in light's absence found in my head's recess
I carve these final words in the bones of age old souls
They scream with me the same matching the lifelong acquired tone
It echos hurt without a cause and loss that burns without a balm
I feel my structure is all wrong, chest is caving, heart is small
Mind is managed through a looking glass
To prove I have thoughts at all
Ones that don't drift in from the smog that sits so stale in this room
Ah, but the walls, they are so smooth
And no doors to allow the ****** and thieves to find their way on through
Solitude
No other view
They tell me I enjoy this so I don't refute
Content with time spent sitting wishing for some context
The prospect is unnerving
Voices rise with every wording
Therapeutic or otherworldly?
I am worthy!
I think..
I am sane!
So they speak..
But they lie everyday, so who do I believe?
Fully unraveled I see I can't even trust me.