I still pray to a god I don't believe in and ask for him to save me. I cry late at night, and the water is rising. My eyes are sore from to prickling, my heart is sore from the wear. Each tear that leaves my eyes leaves a little bit more of a space to feel empty. I miss feeling whole and I only feel whole when you give me your attention but once you fall asleep, or once we part even temporarily, I feel the bottomless pit of despair. I guess you're a drug; you get me high as a kite and make me feel good and fun and then when the wind does down I fall until the next breeze picks me up. I feel so ******* empty. I've tried pills, alcohol, and smoke to fill the void, nothing sticks. I'm running away from the inevitable demise of myself.