here i am again 6:18 a.m.
losing thought
or mind caught
behind my body and certainly my paranoia
which light years ahead it dives and dives
till the light is no more bright or warm
its a distant candle in a cloud
and its getting thicker now
the smoke surrounds
its choking
coming in my lungs or out my mouth
i cant tell
it seems so all surrounding
pulling rugs from out my vibrance
till it dwindels shrivels
a frail trigger on anxiety
these ropes they tie to me
and without warning pull and strain
not a feeling such as pain, but loss
or close enough it does not matter
now :25 and i must remember
it takes no one to bring me joy
and yet i love to give up laughter