i lost my innocence when i began to believe **** was superior to ***:
reliable, constant, and emotionless.

i lost my control when i realized i was getting high to calm my anxiety and tempt sleep rather than have fun.

i lost my sanity when i convinced myself my problems were too trivial to express and so i dismissed them to the farthest recesses of my brain.

i lost my integrity when i started viewing myself as a sequence of numbers and statistics and measurements that never quite seemed to add up.

i lost you when you went looking for yourself. you were the only one who kept me balanced and now

                                                 i have tipped the scales completely. i have rejected humanity with all their useless emotions and inevitable flaws, falling into a senseless and seamless abyss that i do not know how to escape from.

i have lost myself.






i am gone.