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Aug 2014
all you can hear is me swallow my spit.
Right in the middle of the room, on the carpet we sit.
In awkward silence.
Playing on our phones;
Cause I don't really have anywhere else to go;
With conversation.

She's so breathtaking.
The minute I think of something,
I look up and lose it.
My brain is blank pages of nothing.
But when I get home my journals are always filled; to the brim with words , as I skim through my tangled thoughts and release them through this pen.

Something from within .
My heart belongs with Him,
So I - don't know if God - will ever - let me lend - it out.
But if does it'll be worth it,
Cause this girl takes away all my hurtin'.

I Swear she's like a drug.
She's all up in my veins.
Smoking ounces of that Abel ,
I don't mess around Cain.

Is this all a dream?
Or is this all the real deal?
I wish I could IM God and tell him how I really feel,
He'd probably respond back:

"A good woman is hard to find, and worth far more than diamonds. Her husband trusts her without reserve, and never has reason to regret it. Never spiteful, she treats him generously all her life long. She shops around for the best yarns and cottons, and enjoys knitting and sewing. She’s like a trading ship that sails to faraway places and brings back exotic surprises. She’s up before dawn, preparing breakfast for her family and organizing her day. She looks over a field and buys it, then, with money she’s put aside, plants a garden. First thing in the morning, she dresses for work, rolls up her sleeves, eager to get started. She senses the worth of her work, is in no hurry to call it quits for the day. She’s skilled in the crafts of home and hearth, diligent in homemaking. She’s quick to assist anyone in need, reaches out to help the poor. She doesn’t worry about her family when it snows; their winter clothes are all mended and ready to wear. She makes her own clothing, and dresses in colorful linens and silks. Her husband is greatly respected when he deliberates with the city fathers. She designs gowns and sells them, brings the sweaters she knits to the dress shops. Her clothes are well-made and elegant, and she always faces tomorrow with a smile. When she speaks she has something worthwhile to say, and she always says it kindly. She keeps an eye on everyone in her household, and keeps them all busy and productive. Her children respect and bless her; her husband joins in with words of praise: “Many women have done wonderful things, but you’ve outclassed them all!” Charm can mislead and beauty soon fades. The woman to be admired and praised is the woman who lives in the Fear-of- GOD. Give her everything she deserves! Festoon her life with praises! "(‭Proverbs‬ ‭31‬:‭10-31‬ MSG)
This literally happened two nights ago. I'm chilling out with a friend, who has every potential to become my girlfriend, and we talk & talk for an hour but after that the conversation ceases and we're left in a awkward situation. The title "if God had IM" comes from me wanting to get quicker access to Him and talk to him about this new relationship. Is it what he wants for me? Or should fall back and wait patiently like I've always been doing . Thank you for reading . ❤️
Elijah
Written by
Elijah  26/M/Delaware
(26/M/Delaware)   
469
 
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