I can still remember that one night
we laid on the side walk as it rained.
I remember how my heart started beating
really fast when you scooted closer and our arms touched.
I remember how your lips were chapped and your mouth
was dry.
I remember the way you hugged me that night
and how happy we were at that party.
We sat in the corner, arm to arm and talked
as if no one else was there.
I remember showing you Hurt by nine inch nails
and how you told me you liked
Johnny Cash's cover better.
I remember the passion in your eyes when you were explaining why.
I remember the nervous laugh followed by a "sorry" and the crooked
smile that all went together
as if it were some sort of recipe
to make my heart speed up.
I remember the song you used to tell me
you'd sing to me
and I remember playing it in your friends garage
and I remember you smiling at me
as if you were saying "this is ours"

And I'll always remember the first time you kissed me
because your mouth was dry
and your lips were chapped
and it was 3 in the morning
and you were walking me home
and I was shivering because it was winter.
You stopped walking and grabbed my arm
I remember how I swung around to face you
and how it was like the movies.
or how the only thing to light up your
face was the orange streetlights.
I remember how once we kissed I couldn't breathe.
I thought I was being choked.
you took my breath away.

I remember how I dated a few people after you
I remember their lips being really soft
and their mouths were never dry.
I remember comparing them to you
and not knowing why.
Because I'm definitely over you.
I remember that you told me,
no matter what,
I'd always have a piece of your heart.
I think you're a really good liar.
I hear people talk about you and
I want to join the conversation and
tell them stories about the funny stuff we did
but then I remember that I was a secret.
We were a secret.
I guess it'd be dumb to tell people now.
So when people ask,
I pretend like I don't know what it
feels like to have loved and lost.