tucked into your white sea of bed sheets staring at the movement behind your eyelids trying to avoid your products of reproduction and the sinister spinning earth you had the nerve to write "see you in your dreams by the sea" in a book in black ink but you never kept that promise sometimes i trace my finger tips over your handwriting silly, right? i remember you took my face between the palms of your hands, the cracks in them like little valley's your blue eyes a blood shot glittering hypnotizing ocean gem of comfort and peace and acceptance and the words "promise you'll never die" slipped off of my tongue like hot tea and i was too young to know that we all die someday, that death comes out of the blue like a ***** whale breaking apart the ocean waves like that moses guy in the bible just to breathe and kiss the salty air and you grabbed my face and kissed my forehead and you told me you promise and i hope that was on your mind when you touched those sheets and I hope my innocent face flashed through your mind when you tied it around the pipe the flashbacks of you holding me for the first time and I hope the last thought on your mind was me when it broke your neck and the angels came and took you and i hope you know that the emptiness in me will never be filled and I hope you know that even when you thought nobody cared, nobody listened, nobody loved you i cared and I loved you with every atom in my being and I'm sorry I wasn't old enough to fully understandΒ Β and i'm still waiting to see you in my dreams by the sea