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Jul 2014
most days i sleep my mornings away
sleep the deep feeling of my pain away  
running away from my depression into the comfort of nothingness
no sweet dreams
no beautiful nightmares
just a wide oblivion  
but today.. this morning
I woke to a wonderful sunrise and pain so strong
everything I've kept suppressed
I felt every ounce of pain shooting throughout my body
through every nerve  
I felt like i was drowning
imagine three hundred pounds of held back emotions.. no longer just pain
Throw me into the ocean
sinking
suffocating
swarming me
i can't breathe anymore
think fast..
to my right, bed side handy
800mg
"doctor says take one as needed every four to six hours"
but doc what if i need
two just to enter the race
three just to start
four just to take off
five simply to breathe
six, seven, eight just to feel
nine and ten to get where i want to be
sorry doc
six of them I took then i took some more,
pills I popped.. i'm on the floor
two by ******* two i took them all
now I'm where i want to be
i feel nothing at all
marïama
Written by
marïama
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