it's been exactly 7 days
since i was, again,
thrown into a body of water
too vast to swim to the edge of,
and too deep to keep my
head above the surface,
and not one person has
come to my rescue.
it's all been
"you shouldn't have done that"
and
"you've slept with him before"
and
"stop drinking with older guys"
and too much silence
my hollow bones can stand.
so i'm going back to the center,
i'm holding my breath till i'm blue.
there is a sinking ship
where my heart should be
and i'm about to go down with it.
this is not self defense,
this is a distress signal
no one is picking up on.