I can feel myself slipping From this world And slowly sinking Into the depths of darkness – Watching those familiar faces Fade from my grasp Instead becoming consumed By confusion, Fear And muteness. The iron bars of my cage.
Plunging into my thoughts, A never ending sea of blackness. Slowly suffocating As the barriers fortify Around my mind. A cry, a scream for help As I pound at the strengthening barriers: Someone help me! Let me out of here! Before taciturnity robs me Of my speech. Routines and repetitions, And my own world engulfs me.
Muteness and trembling. Please, Taci, speak! Your voice, the panic, the worry As you grasp my shoulders And shake me With an unknown fear As if to break me from this state. Why can’t you speak? My own eyes wide As I stare at you, Dumbfounded and fearful.
Sinking deeper into the depths Of my mind: Slipping further and further Into routines and obsessions. Voices are faded, from another world, Alien and vague Spoken in another language. Incomprehensible and of no meaning, No use to me!
You watch me on the other side Of the invisible barrier; Your hand blocked from my reach. No matter how hard, How much you want to help And try, Nothing can be done To stop me from Slipping through your fingers.
I gaze from afar Through the tiny window of my mind. Watching you all laugh, smile and cry. What do your emotions mean? What are they for? What do your face expressions mean? I am not built for this world: Too fragile and brittle. One hit and I'll smash Into a million billion shards. My obsessions Perceived as ecccentric. My way of speaking - The shakiness in my voice And the muteness Deemed abnormal. I am an alien becoming more alien. My language and my mind Both unsolved paradoxes.