If I close my eyes,
I can still feel his breath against my neck.
And the way he said
"You're beautiful"
Like a promise.

His words crawled under my skin,
Made a home in the caverns of self hate and desire to be wanted.
His hands roamed the planes of my body,
Crawling over them like speed bumps on a road.
Slowly but without care,
Caution was never his strong point.

I can see the way you looked at me,
That day in the guidance counsellors office,
Tears streaking down your face.
I can picture you saying
With the heartbreaking sincerity
"I really like him".

I held your hand and stroked your hair,
And then crawled into his bed for the first time
Two weeks later.
Your friendship was the promise I should have kept,
Not the empty ones that he whispered against my skin.