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Mar 2014
If I were to describe the distance between us,
I wouldn’t know what to compare it to.
They say that the Moon is approximately 238,900 miles away from planet Earth,
Pluto is about 3.67 billion miles away from the Sun,
And the Milky Way is roughly 120,000 light years in diameter.
You’re about 1,275.6 miles away from me,
But it seems like the miles between us is greater than the distance between galaxies and stars alike.
They always told me that distance makes the heart grow fonder,
But how does that work when my heart only ever aches because you’re so far away?

I miss you
But these three syllables don’t quite add up,
They don’t make sense.
“I miss you so ******* much” doesn’t quite compare to the emptiness I feel when you’re not around,
It doesn’t compare to the distance between us.

You found a hidden vein into my heart,
Picked the lock of the cage
And stole my fist-sized *****,
Never intending to return it,
Only planning to use it,
Manipulate it,
Mold it like clay
And make it seem easy to shapeshift.
I made you my home planet,
The one I came to when I was down,
When I was all bruised in a rainbow of colors.
They say that home is where the heart is,
But what is a home
When your heart is in someone else’s hands?

I made you my home body,
But I was merely a nobody,
A distant star 2,000 light years away
That always seemed to be forgotten,
Only ever remembered when I shone too brightly in your eyes.

I was your Neverland,
The second star to the right,
A place for those who wished to never grow up.
You were my Peter Pan,
My lost boy
Who only ever wanted to be found,
But in a sudden turn of events,
You grew up without me.
I lost track of your age,
You were just a boy the last time I saw your face,
Chubby-cheeked and wide-grinned
With your feathered hat high up above your head.
I was your Wendy,
A believer in you,
The lover you loved so dearly,
I was your darling.
You left
And aged so nicely,
Grew tall so swiftly,
And I was merely the ant in your shoe,
A pest on your land of ageless dreams.
I was forgotten,
And I wish you believed in me like you believed in fairies,
Wish you sprinkled dust on me
So you can watch me soar and pass by you,
Wish you saved me from drowning in you like how you saved me at Mermaid’s Lagoon,
Wish you had never grown up without me.
We swore eternity to each other,
Promised each other infinity,
Vowed to never ever grow up here.
You told me you loved me,
And then you disappeared.
I forgot about your story for a while
Until you reappeared so suddenly,
Though you lost me from your memory,
And I can feel the distance between us grow even more,
Felt home vanish quicker than a heartbeat,
Felt you shrinking smaller than I could have ever wanted.
You were my Peter Pan,
My Never Land,
My home planet,
My whole universe,
And if this isn’t love,
Then, please, tell me what was it?
Jaya Gumatay
Written by
Jaya Gumatay
941
 
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