the world is one huge heart. spilling over full of blood. the worst parts are black and wretched. a transplant must be imminent.

if only I could pretend its spring. the sun shines and I feel nothing.  barely. breathing but it's the pills. they keep me but not up or down. they just keep me. sometimes I smile with you. your eyes as bright as dead stars.
a lot of who I was pools up until I can't stop. wishing and aching. feeling and burning. the world stops for no one. not the trees or the big blue ocean. forget the waves, I'm here.