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Feb 2014

This is the feeling,
of burning in hell.
When I jumped off
the cliff of happiness.

I jumped in the depths
of hell the only thing
I learned through this

Is the burn don't melt
neither does it turn to gel
I learned that the burn
don't melt! It just burns and burns

Until your the whole
body's immersed...

I feel like I'm trapped,
under water but I cant get up
and I cant swim.

My body pushes further
Until the water is barely
Beneath my chin.

Every single time
You try, You try grab for something
to fail centimetres within,
But every time You risk drowning

Knowing that winning
that special thing? Is once again

I know what you do
You keep on checking
your phone and nothing...

You feel loneliness
Is better than this feeling?

You want to live,
but your heart stops beating.

Silenced in a crowded room,
yet your insides are screaming!!

Every exit sign is bright green
but every sign is misleading.

We all struggle with it,
because we've dug through
and endless tunnel.

Knees and Nails are bleeding,
we come up for that gasp of air.
Only to realise were back at the beginning.

You want to go to sleep,
and feeling that not waking up
is the best case and the best idea.

Because every action you try
Because every action you do
The outcome of them has no meaning

But you go back to sleep
where demons dance and smile.
on trickled coals
But you carry on believing.

You try and take control
surrounded by the people you love
But you're still alone.

It's like having 52 cards in your
hands but worthless is the feeling
so you decide to fold.

Because my body is useless
the cliff I jumped off?
Killed my soul.

Depression it plays with its toys
depression isn't a choice
its learning, realising,
and expressing a void.

So when you wake up
in the morning.

Wake up knowing..

You're Still Here

Don't get scared
Depressions main meal.

**Is Fear
D - Matter
Written by
D - Matter  England
   Amelia Crake
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