i was going to do a Rimbaud....
write some poetry in my youth and hoist a white
flag: to summon the: despise...
i am...                i was...    i will...
in between the i shall not...
         this infuriating balance and act to give
up... but it seems i'm like a rock star
with my words and whenever i say i will
retire: i am asked implored begged to give back
to the people the Minotaur's psychology
of the labyrinth... not a cage not some Freudian
and Jungian: man is a 2 dimensional creature
and all that was and will be ever known about man
can be reveled in succinct theory without
practice: yes... psychology as such is good for
people who have no background in philosophy:
airy fairy...
i used to be a poet-journalist
a bit like... day to day... i sneeze i wipe my nose
i used to be a poet-journalist
but i feel a backlog existential constipation
i have been away from the "art": no! i've been
away from the canvas for far too long
so much has happened that i am now left with
the impossible feat of a librarian of memories:
and the emotions and the memories have started to
belong to "others" and not my me my-self...
the hyphen complex of what was once
the reflexive pronoun
not the reflective pronoun without out...
even today after failing my practical test:
it's unlike any other exam prior...
practical ex\m not even mentioned when
you study chemistry for a degree...
i wanted to retire... my retirement has been cut short
i'm still plowing the field
of corpses and bad b'a'a'a'aah sheepish
****** ejaculations...
       ugh... and only last night i figured: figured
is positively a negative connotation not
even borrowing from the thesaurus...
i went to the exam trembling
without a panic attack:
i had the clutch in my stomach
and the accelerator pedal in my mouth
as i was fuming Berzerk: berzercker double decker
i want to bite ms. R back

handshake with Roger Federer
crosswords with my grandmother watching
yo **! all hands!
hoist the colours high!
heave **! thieves and beggars!
never shall we die!

interrupt a painter and a squid of squidge of sounds
never pardon my passing soul
take a donkey
take a horse
now that i know how to walk
i learned to crawl i learned to walk
then to use the gravity attached to a bicycle
then a horse:
now: much much later the car and...

now i have to think about cooking
a dinner for both me and grandma
and tending to her feet because
she has doubling growing toenails digging into
her toes...
and if ms. R will act like she acts:
Anti-Oedipus
it's enough that i married a woman
17 years older than me
that i have now have to deal with
a jealous vampire-girl
jealous of her mother getting ******
now i can't even touch this young vampire
if she would have bitten me
i would bite her back
O jealousy and the glorious of
the marriage of AEAA
yawn yeah and all i will not sigh with relief:
ah¬                  this needs to be included
as a unique pointer not an exclamation mark
but: who¬