heaving breaths and it feels like gods choking me again, my vocal cords are strained, my voice a squeak. Invisible tears stain my cheeks, still dry. I'm imploding and becoming super-nova or maybe a black hole instead. Screaming a whisper:
H E L P M E
You ever just feel so unable to speak that it's like a chain around your neck? Even though you want more than anything to talk about it? I used to get that a lot.