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May 22
Carlita had the hots for Boris but she couldn't tell anyone because her lips were too big to form words after the helicopter crash. "Dear Mama," she wrote on a roll of new toilet paper, "I love Boris and there's nothing you can do about it!" Later, after her lips returned to normal, she and Boris took a helicopter to eastern Poland where the people were so stupid that neither of them could believe it. "All those ****** jokes must've come from here," Boris lamented as gerbils fought for their young lives to escape from his ******.
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