GIVING PHILOSOPHY LESSONS IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE is what movie characters are good at. I bought this egg timer from a man yesterday who had many stories to tell but I can't tell you because they involve the C.I.A., ****** and factory workers who make Crisco. I bought a propane heater because my propane was cold. My ex-lesbian neighbor told me that in Germany everybody who's dead must be buried or burned only after a fake ****** mustache is pasted on them. It's really strange that they would do that.