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May 29
I hate that you took away my ability to believe that anyone loves me.
I hate that you twisted my mind in places that forced me to be afraid,
Constantly.
I hate that you made the self hate cut deeper.
You made me hate myself so much more.
I hate that you made me feel so ******* insane,
In a way that I thought I deserved the pain…
Self inflicted or otherwise.
I hate that I begged you to **** me
Just to make the pain stop
And to satisfy this weirdly imbedded thought that somehow it would make your life easier.

I hate you and the ghosts and the scars you’ve left me with.
I hate you and I didn’t deserve this.

And whilst there  are moments like this…
Where I feel empty and worthless.
Know that the times where I feel ten feet tall and more powerful than a god are far more common.
You’ve taken things, pieces of me. But you can’t take anything else.
Madds
Written by
Madds  Melbourne
(Melbourne)   
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