This is one of those days
where I know i'm dying
and that there is a blade in my drawer
I just couldn't throw away
that coud help to speed up the process
Someone asked me how I am so happy all the time
they said they wish they could be more like me
and god that makes me feel so guilty
like i've somehow made a standard in someones life
that what I am is happy
but they can never attain what I am
because i'm a fake smile
and one more bad day away from dying
because
of all the things screaming at me in my head
the only ones I clearly hear
are the ones telling me to do it