because while i scrub the tiles
I can't hear you in the kitchen
I can't hear the words you say under your breath

While trying to get rid of the ugliness between the tiles
I try to get rid of the ugliness inside me
My head can only recite you words
even if I try to imagine histories of other words
even if I repeat my mantra
                                               aléjate de mi aléjate de mi aléjate de mi
I can only hear those voices

Am I too much?

why is that the me that i thought was the best of me
is the one hurting you?
why is that i thought that everything was fine
but every word
every look
every action
was hurting you?
why is that i was convinced that the worst was behind us?

is bad that even if you are telling me that I'm hurting you
every day
every second
I can only cry?

am I bad for thinking in the way your words hurt me
when you are the one hurting?

is this the best that I can get?

I just keep running in circles
thinking that I'm close to the end

I thought that -
does it matter what i thought?

the bathroom is clean now
I didn't want you to enter
I wasn't finished yet
is everything I say that hurtful?