The past exists in my memory as a prolonged scream. Unfinished nonsense bellowed at the uncaring sky or roared down the maw of the savage beast I'm still terrified I'll become before finally being published. I can hear the rough draft in my hard and swollen throat. We were so ******* Once upon a time, y'know, once upon a time. You and me, babe my god, we were yesterday. In the mornings I wake up, sore and aging away from limber, and I miss who we were and I worry about who I'm still becoming and the only benefit of age I've so far discovered is the knowledge that I always will. We don't ever get back the people, and places that we've lost. They're gone, but so is 17 and so are we and so are they and ******* it all, so am I. If you're not careful you'll fall into a nostalgia trap and you'll stay until you discover that the only way out is to remember that we're never really happy not even then. We carry a little sad around always. I know, I know: That's hard to get nostalgic about. What can I say? We are so yesterday.