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May 26
Times and times again
I get this ugly temptation
To confess my love to you
But there are some conditions
You have to be alone in your room
You also have to be in a good mood
Third you must not be armed
Preferentially your arms have to be tied
Finally I want you to listen to me
Until I am satisfied
Only then you can speak your mind
I will talk about your genesis as the whisperer
And mine as a poet
The December night when you whispered
A ***** little thing you saw, at a party
At that point I truly saw you,
First time not diluted in the background
An orchestra of violins, pianos and trumpets
Played as I gazed at you snowed under the lights
Standing two stairs above me
That night your name was etched on my mind
then on my forearm which I will kiss before bed
and then in every fibre of my existence
I miss those days, when every stranger's face was yours
Every voice was mistaken to be yours
I shed tears pretty as the mistletoes
Because you were cruel
You said awful things, you did them too
Didn’t understand which way the wind blew
For three months I loved you
Like my life was dependent on it
But then we were separated
Deep within me, I was relieved
I thought I could escape your curse
I didn’t though
you came back, harder than before
you wanted help which I was glad to do
I wanted to latch on to anything that resembled
You, you, and you
And when the parting was over
I came back, but you were still cruel
Like you were back in December
And at the end of my manifesto
I will look into your eyes, and say
I still feel the same way

I assume at that point there will be two possibilities
You either hate me for life
Or you want to end me
If I am right, I’d rather have you **** me
People often raise eyebrows
For how candidly I talk about death
They don’t know I fear it, more than they do
But sometimes it is a preference
Over something else in life
So in the name of virtues
I permit you to end mine
This is a very personal and autobiographical poem.
Ahmad Attr
Written by
Ahmad Attr  20/M/Pakistan
         TTagain, Shwetha sb and Ahmad Attr
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