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how can one be frightened by their own mystique?
there is so much of myself i am unsure of, fear, of what i am capable of.
then led into an eschewed umbra of curiosity.
i have acted in numerous obscure ways,
why can i not just-
one night without the pain of you.
without the pain of my crimes that i may or may not have committed.
and so i'll let myself absorb into a lifeless bleak state of emptiness,
so my other side stays in the dark, disintegrating out of existence.
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