Excitement pumped throughout my palms.
Sitting on the table,
I waited for a sign from you.
Hope lingered,
if only I would have known.

There was so much to look forward to
in this little room.
So many dreams to be had
by this small existence.
Only time would tell.

We held our breath
to hear our future.
Tears and anger followed.
There was no sign.
No sound.
No beat.
No life.

I’ll never forget the defeat
the denial
the devastation
the death.
You had barely just begun.
Now you will never be.

I felt it was my fault.
I could have done better.
I could have dreamed bigger.
I could have wished harder.
I could have…
done nothing.
Nothing.
Nothing.

I think about you often.
What would you look like?
What would you become?
Do you think of me too?
I’d like to think we’d be friends,
past the titles we were originally given,
but it will never be.

You left me that day.
It wasn’t your fault,
but I weep every year.
Understanding has never come.
My heart holds you still,
my joy.