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Apr 2021
My hands are no longer white,
I don't have bows in my hair or butterflies on my shoes.
When I sleep I no longer dream of blue sky beaches or green meadows.
I am not clueless now, but I wish I was.
Crying when I fell over and scrapped my knee turned into crying over loss and love and hate.  
How I feel so much more than I used to.
Walking in the park and feeding the ducks, I remember holding my mothers hand,
but I cannot remember the last time I did.
I am not innocent anymore.
As i've grown everything has became more complicated.
I've been taught how to live in this world but i've not been taught how to cope with that.
What do we do when we become lost,
A perilous maze of despair we spend days, weeks , years trapped inside.
There is nothing we can do as we're not taught peace.
Its like the adults are afraid to discuss peace of mind, afraid that we will achieve it before them.
We grow up experiencing different types of fears.
Monsters under the bed to one day fearing death, and everything else in-between that.
Standing on the edge of a cliff, knowing full well if u take one step forward you'd fall.
Its that knowing that death is always there that scares me the most.
I could die tonight. Or tomorrow. So what's the point in fearing death?
I've had my brain be manipulated by to many ideas. Listened to people preach what they think life is, it's not gave me enough room to question it myself. No ones mind is ever blank though; like a seed we water to grow into a plant our mind has been developed only by the words of others before us.
I was once white. I once was transparent. I was once a child.
I am no longer innocent.
I'm not blindfolded anymore.
From a seed to a tree to one day...Earth,
I shall be reborn into innocence again.
Mary Woods
Written by
Mary Woods
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