I’ve been sleeping far too much lately and
Letting the days waste away
Watching them fade into one another until
There’s no substance left
And I’ll admit I’m still thinking of you
Despite the years that separate the
Volatile future from the ambient past
Yes, the anger still lurks inside me
But my lonely heart still seeks you, still
Hurts that I’ll never find something like
What we were; you and I could have
Been beautiful in another place or time
I don’t think I forgive you, I don’t think that’s right
That doesn’t keep you off my mind, doesn’t
Stop me from wondering how you are
From checking up on you, out of hate or morbid love
I’ve come to the uncomfortable conclusion that
You’ll be a part of me until I die
That you’re tangled in my being, inextricably and
Curiously I’ve come to accept it
Come to accept what has been but won’t be again
Sometimes I wish I had a better farewell
Something that won’t ache when one of us dies
I wish I could send you this poem for old time’s sake
But I’m not prepared
To ever see you return into my life