Feb 2021
"Daddy. Wake up. You had a big fall! Don't leave please, can you see me? You must come back! Don't look into the light, it will take you from me!"
The only sad part of this world is our languages serve no purpose!
Everyone and everything made no sense. Besides my own child. His appearance, not effected by this place. All friends and family presented before me, were grey and the weight of sadness was strong, with the stillness from silence filling the air. For some odd reason, I could scream and rage. But couldn't speak my son's name!
No, other place felt like home!
From the day, my visit with the realm of white
was short-lived.
My son's gentle voice
Strong enough to shatter the silence and brighten the dimness of environment. Floating in the abyss, until my soul established connection...
Back to this living hell once again! Flying through timelines, to ensure my detached spirit have it's reunion with my body!
My guardian angel told me
"Release yourself, from all that hurt you.
The pain is only an illusion and it is temporary."
I hugged onto my savior. Feeling my light fade, remembering how beaten and broken I was.
Every word dripped with blood, fighting against the pain to stay awake. Breathing was forced, this is NOT to be of the life
I once had love for...
I could hear my voice and perpetual thoughts, along with that of family members, running and slamming into another!
Breaking the atmosphere of this unearthly dimension. All in high efforts to reach out to me! No documentary or biography on a big screen compared, to seeing multiple lifelines flash before your eyes. Knowing it's all coming to an end, although the checkpoint served as a deciding point for another rare chance. Just for that desired taste, for a bittersweet victory.
Regardless, if I would have fought back during battle. There would have been a war.
What would have stayed the same?
Would any difference have changed the outcome?
Is there an escape from this pain?
I never asked for this!
I didn't even have, a chance to make a fist! Two fools wanting to be Mr Big Dog, Mr Big S*, all in hands of my disposal, were aimless words in my defense!
If I knew then what was known now. I would have, gave you no option to call anyone willing to help you on your checklist!
My eyes were brimming with tears of anger. The glow from
my new found home slowly leaving me as while peacefully carrying myself away.
"Free myself? In a world shrouded in darkness. I lived for light! Empowered by Faith, and Hope to make amends so Karma will not interfere with destiny!
Forgive and accept, I am the one left with regrets to bring the strongest of angels to their knees, to have a final moment to wept!"
Do you wish to be free? You may not come back as the same. The world is not ready for you to fall." The angelic voice soothe the sound of commotion of the thoughts and voices. It became background noise, instead of overpowering.
"Perhaps, I won't fall. If you let me go. It's fine. It was my decision! I am ready! I do not fear the fall, sorrow put a deafening hold on aspirations. It's all or nothing. It was Isaiah I needed to protect. This wasn't possible as human, I was ready to surrender any part of myself!
I give my light in just to master what was feared most.
Darkness.
It was my turn to fly!
Seeing the alarming expression on my guardian's angel's face shift from confident to worried, and then accepting.
Falling so fast, even an angel of light
could not respond quick enough to save me.
My grasp purposely broken, to save and prove "Love" can save in all terms on any magnitude.
I realized, it's best to compromise and be a sacrifice!
My vision was consumed by the black energy, pouring from my overworked heart.
...
"Hey wake up....
You fell asleep Mr....
Are you okay?"
an innocent voice of a loved one filled my ears once again.
It was my son! I was lost in his glowing and reflective eyes, unaware on how he speaks, to me as if he didn't know of my identity. Fascinated with the fact my appearance increased in muscle mass, my eyes appeared more vicious and intimidating.
Even my clothing were different, in a place where you never believe clothing would exist!
I was in a grey shirt, and blue jeans stained with blood. When I first encountered, Isaiah and my guardian angel. Now, I am wearing all black button up, paired with black formal dress pants, along with matching shoes.
My height was equivalent to Slenderman and felt like my hands were strong enough to pick up people like marbles.
The painful breaths subsided.
My essence felt stronger.
"Be free but don't allow yourself to fall. If light fails to convince, we can give the darkness a try."
The duality between a gruff voice a masculine voice combined with a feminine nurturing voice in unison. Played like my favorite symphatetic melody, singing beautifully in the back of my mind.
I knew I was alive. The complexities of my body, were running in adrenaline mode.
Everything felt, powerful and responding to all my worries suddenly, felt instinctive.
My hand gently placed on my son's shoulder. I kneeled down on one knee, staring into the eyes of my beloved son. Feeling my own voice running, with the flow of new found energy revitalized in my stronger body.
"Isaiah...remember my promise?" I said with flowing waves of happiness, while smiling carefree.
"Daddy...?"
Isaiah said with a surprising smile, his eyes glistened with tears of happiness.
"I will always be free." I started
Without you, I will never fall!"
we both said together, with a brief laugh, we hugged each other and the light from the realm finally returned us home.
The only sad part of this world is our languages serve no purpose!
Everyone and everything made no sense. Besides my own child. His appearance, not effected by this place. All friends and family presented before me, were grey and the weight of sadness was strong, with the stillness from silence filling the air. For some odd reason, I could scream and rage. But couldn't speak my son's name!
No, other place felt like home!
From the day, my visit with the realm of white
was short-lived.
My son's gentle voice
Strong enough to shatter the silence and brighten the dimness of environment. Floating in the abyss, until my soul established connection...
Back to this living hell once again! Flying through timelines, to ensure my detached spirit have it's reunion with my body!
My guardian angel told me
"Release yourself, from all that hurt you.
The pain is only an illusion and it is temporary."
I hugged onto my savior. Feeling my light fade, remembering how beaten and broken I was.
Every word dripped with blood, fighting against the pain to stay awake. Breathing was forced, this is NOT to be of the life
I once had love for...
I could hear my voice and perpetual thoughts, along with that of family members, running and slamming into another!
Breaking the atmosphere of this unearthly dimension. All in high efforts to reach out to me! No documentary or biography on a big screen compared, to seeing multiple lifelines flash before your eyes. Knowing it's all coming to an end, although the checkpoint served as a deciding point for another rare chance. Just for that desired taste, for a bittersweet victory.
Regardless, if I would have fought back during battle. There would have been a war.
What would have stayed the same?
Would any difference have changed the outcome?
Is there an escape from this pain?
I never asked for this!
I didn't even have, a chance to make a fist! Two fools wanting to be Mr Big Dog, Mr Big S*, all in hands of my disposal, were aimless words in my defense!
If I knew then what was known now. I would have, gave you no option to call anyone willing to help you on your checklist!
My eyes were brimming with tears of anger. The glow from
my new found home slowly leaving me as while peacefully carrying myself away.
"Free myself? In a world shrouded in darkness. I lived for light! Empowered by Faith, and Hope to make amends so Karma will not interfere with destiny!
Forgive and accept, I am the one left with regrets to bring the strongest of angels to their knees, to have a final moment to wept!"
Do you wish to be free? You may not come back as the same. The world is not ready for you to fall." The angelic voice soothe the sound of commotion of the thoughts and voices. It became background noise, instead of overpowering.
"Perhaps, I won't fall. If you let me go. It's fine. It was my decision! I am ready! I do not fear the fall, sorrow put a deafening hold on aspirations. It's all or nothing. It was Isaiah I needed to protect. This wasn't possible as human, I was ready to surrender any part of myself!
I give my light in just to master what was feared most.
Darkness.
It was my turn to fly!
Seeing the alarming expression on my guardian's angel's face shift from confident to worried, and then accepting.
Falling so fast, even an angel of light
could not respond quick enough to save me.
My grasp purposely broken, to save and prove "Love" can save in all terms on any magnitude.
I realized, it's best to compromise and be a sacrifice!
My vision was consumed by the black energy, pouring from my overworked heart.
...
"Hey wake up....
You fell asleep Mr....
Are you okay?"
an innocent voice of a loved one filled my ears once again.
It was my son! I was lost in his glowing and reflective eyes, unaware on how he speaks, to me as if he didn't know of my identity. Fascinated with the fact my appearance increased in muscle mass, my eyes appeared more vicious and intimidating.
Even my clothing were different, in a place where you never believe clothing would exist!
I was in a grey shirt, and blue jeans stained with blood. When I first encountered, Isaiah and my guardian angel. Now, I am wearing all black button up, paired with black formal dress pants, along with matching shoes.
My height was equivalent to Slenderman and felt like my hands were strong enough to pick up people like marbles.
The painful breaths subsided.
My essence felt stronger.
"Be free but don't allow yourself to fall. If light fails to convince, we can give the darkness a try."
The duality between a gruff voice a masculine voice combined with a feminine nurturing voice in unison. Played like my favorite symphatetic melody, singing beautifully in the back of my mind.
I knew I was alive. The complexities of my body, were running in adrenaline mode.
Everything felt, powerful and responding to all my worries suddenly, felt instinctive.
My hand gently placed on my son's shoulder. I kneeled down on one knee, staring into the eyes of my beloved son. Feeling my own voice running, with the flow of new found energy revitalized in my stronger body.
"Isaiah...remember my promise?" I said with flowing waves of happiness, while smiling carefree.
"Daddy...?"
Isaiah said with a surprising smile, his eyes glistened with tears of happiness.
"I will always be free." I started
Without you, I will never fall!"
we both said together, with a brief laugh, we hugged each other and the light from the realm finally returned us home.
