it took me so many signs for myself to realize i was acting upon what i believed was my fault
i would eventually contradict myself into thinking that i was incapable of some feeling because i deserved it.
but i am no princess

and i feel bleak so why does it hurt.
i wonder if i deserve it.

it is very lonesome outside,
looking for some type of feeling
maybe those nights were different
and if i asked you to come,
would
you?