your sister laughs at the to of her lungs
while my tears water the pillow
maybe the ashes on it will grow into a phoenix, probably not
they say the phoenix rises from the ashes
burns again
then rises again
then burns again
then rises again, and the cycle never ends
it feels like my life is going the same way
crying in bed
suicide attempts
hospital beds
and it feels like it's never gonna end
but it ends
though it doesn't feel like rising
cause it happens again
cause when I rise to the surface
above the water
it seems like I've forgotten how to take a breath
it goes up and down
but up doesn't feel good
it's not as bad as down
still, it feels confusing
scary
cause I know I will turn into ashes
yet again
your sister laughs
I cry in my bed
I keep it down so u don't hear a sound
cause I don't want you to ask me why I'm crying
I'll probably just end up lying
saying I'm fine
and I don't want your sister hearing me cry anyway
the moon whispers goodnight
but the drunk rooster
screams wake up!
I'm awake, rooster
I always am
but darling moon
I'm dead inside