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Nov 2020
Dear A. R.

The conversation we were having the other day was undoubtedly exhausting. It’s unfortunate that it has even gotten to the point where we don’t know if we want to say anything at all to each other. There was a period where there was so much energy in our conversations that we could feel it in our bones.

Although our association was for a short time, having the opportunity to connect with you was meaningful, thought-provoking, and enlivening.

I really considered you a friend, hence the yellow themes. But at times, of course, more than a friend, especially when we discussed the deeper parts of ourselves or exchanged images or stories that translated to ‘personalized’ gifts. Those were vulnerabilities and hidden parts of us that not everyone gets to see or know.  Thank you for sharing those with me and for allowing me to gift those to you as well.

Keeping those nice times in mind, it’s no secret that there were also times we disagreed. This was due to not respecting one another’s boundaries. I don’t think there would have been any combination of words that could have solved that- it was much too contradictory to solve without having backfire of some kind.

Boundaries, sometimes but not always, translate into contingencies. By nature, my own boundary involved you responding in a certain way.

We could not continue with the status quo.

I want you to know there was a reason I sent you an art piece with the formula  PR = 120/ Do (Dawes’ Limit) displayed a few weeks prior. I found it pleasing and playful that the formula expresses the closest that two stars can appear together in the sky and still be seen as two distinct strs with an optical device; Two different people, two different lives, far away yet very close.

The purpose of choosing that particular marking or reasoning applies even more so now, because things have been, unfortunately,

fuzzy and incoherent.

I want you to know that I took the time to think about the finer and originally unseen details from your point of view.

When all is said and done, our dynamic consisted of euphoric fantasies, hopes, and positive dialogue. It's my fondest wish that our connection didn’t lead to just becoming a fuzzy and incoherent star.

Ultimately, this letter can serve as a proxy for both of us.

Not having to restart or stop out loud.
We deserve a resolution. An end.

I want you to know that if I could give you anything else:
Another gift.

It would be to give you the maximum amount of resolving power possible under ideal conditions.


Dawes' limit is a formula to express the maximum resolving power of a microscope or telescope.
Written by
AylahHearts  Near Los Angeles
(Near Los Angeles)   
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