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Oct 2020
kind of? it just fills me with so much-- so much desperation when I think about how many people want to die.

and i spent, like, almost three hours or something yesterday trying to talk people out of it online. because i was thinking about it. but most of them didn't change their minds, or anything.

did i fail them? i could have been their last chance. i could have been so many people's last chance. i could have saved them if i'd known the right words to say.

Woah, hey, hey, I gotta stop you there. You can't blame yourself for it if... if they don't change their minds.You're not the reason they want to die, so it's... it's not your fault if they do. And you're not making them any more likely that they will, either.

no, no, i'm not. i know it's not my fault. but... i just care so much! i can't believe they want to die. i wish i could tell them that i'm here for them and i want to give them all the things they wanted and couldn't get because life couldn't give it to them. i wish i could show them how beautiful it all can be.

But you can't.
You can't even help yourself. Put on your own oxygen mask first, you know?

you and i both know that anything going on with me isn't nearly that serious

It should be.

what's that supposed to mean? are you trying to say that i should be worse? i should want... want to die?

No, no! Jeez. I mean you should take it seriously- as seriously as you've been taking random strangers' problems on the internet. If you don't take care of yourself, then maybe one day the tables'll turn and there'll be someone trying to talk you out of it. You matter too, you know. You're just human.

i

...Are you okay?

y
yeah. sorry. i'm just not used to this

Used to what?

you being nice?
Be kind to yourself. Not everything in the world is your fault. Not every evil is because of your personal failure.

Not sure what to tag.
Kai
Written by
Kai  19/Agender
(19/Agender)   
232
   Larry
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