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Jul 2020
The people who we thought were our blood,
And our supposed treasures,
Never to be abandoned,
Turn out to be nothing but iron pyrite,
Foolishly mistaken for gold.
It’s funny how these assigned individuals,
Who we’re tied together to so tightly by a single string,
Are meant to be family.
Family,
Hiding behind masks,
And fake personas.
Family,
The label given to people who shouldn’t mean anything to me.
But the mistake starts with mine,
I still don’t know how I was so blind.
Why were my expectations for you,
Above the clouds?
Why were they so high?
And how could I be so naive?
I sacrificed everything,
Just for you,
Because that label,
Family,
Deluded me.
I came to your home,
With a massive heart,
Jammed with all the love I’d packed,
To gift you.
You let me into your home,
And you snatched the love I garnered for you.
You waited for just the right moment,
To vanish.
Scampering to someone else’s home,
And losing all my love,
On the way there.
And when you arrived there,
You snickered,
And ridiculed me,
Leaving me empty,
And alone,
Inside of your bare home.
Why does it seem like nobody truly appreciates us?
And why does family always turn against us?
Why do you laugh at us,
For weeping,
And displaying all of our suppressed rage,
When you were the oppressor,
Our silencer,
All along?
Instead of acknowledging our outrage,
Why do you wait for us to leave,
Once we lose the courage to keep fighting,
Only to pretend to go to sleep,
And instead,
Lock yourself,
As well as everyone else,
All my cousins,
In one room together,
Pretending to sleep,
When you’re really chattering,
Insulting,
And snickering,
About us,
And all our hurt?
All night,
You were gossiping about us,
When we were crying ourselves to sleep in the other room.
How could you wake up that morning,
And talk to us again,
As if we were made of stone?
How can you think that your deep seated hatred could easily be disguised as family love?
Why are you talking s*,
About the expression of the unheard?
We are the unheard,
And you are our silencer.
You can’t fling us into a bottomless pit,
Then question why we’re continually sobbing,
Once we’ve desolately climbed out of the infinite trench.
For 3 and a half years,
I was walking with my eyes shut,
But now I can see again,
This cruel world,
And I can finally see what you’ve hid this whole time,
Your true character.
You made me believe that we could rely on you,
And that you’d never go against us,
But now I know,
That not all blood relations are sincere.
The truth will only come out,
Once you stop walking blindly,
And finally open your eyes,
To see the world once again,
The unfiltered world,
You were afraid to see.
At first I thought these relations,
We’re tied solely by a string of love,
But now I know these relations,
Are tied only by bitterness,
And alienation.
It’s only for the enhancement of our own lives,
That we cut the string that held us together,
Because if you can’t acknowledge the hurt,
And suppressed emotions we’ve carried all these years,
And in turn talk against us,
In the depths of the darkness,
“I hate you”,
Will put you in your place.
You threw us into an unending pit,
But we are strong fighters,
To be able to reach the light at the end,
And now we’ll put you in your place,
And throw you right into that very pit,
To where we’d felt helplessly alone,
So you can experience our pain.
Mama always told me,
God never lets go of the people that cause you extreme ache.
So take it as a sign from God,
When you’re falling into that pit,
And you regret everything you ever did.
Farzeen Rashid
Written by
Farzeen Rashid  16/F/Surrey BC Canada
(16/F/Surrey BC Canada)   
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