i remember wishing for more
wishing for privilege money things
that i am not entitled to

but i still wished
for i am selfish and broken and jealous
and i am not the person you think i am

wishing and wishing and wishing
i fell asleep with tears on my face
and guilt churning in my stomach

why am i not enough for me
why do i want more even when i have more than others

why am i like this?

another sleepless night
i still wonder
and i still wish