now i'm supposed to stay awake at night
and write
and think about some ****
that i never wanted to be a part of
because i can't stop writing about it
like i'm used to it
being in my mind
so much
that i have to spew it out
bunch after bunch
after bunch
after bunch
just like the image i had
of throwing up
and not being able to breathe
some craziness
happened to me